What did the you know what screw this I'm sick of making these stupid jokes there all the same. Hang on hang on What did the pirate do to the dog yes This style of joking is so different I'm going to be a famous comedian oh wait there's a whole bloody website full of these. O look another one and another one and another one that knife over there looks really nice right now

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How many babies can you fit in a blender? None, the blender is too small. Also it is illegal to kill a baby infant because they are considered human. You can get life in prison or the death penalty for committing such a heinous crime.

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What do you call a secret agent that lives in a bottle of washing up liquid? Bubble-0-7

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Knock Knock! Whos There? Little boy blew! Little boy blew who? Micheal Jackson....

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Why did the chicken cross the road It was being dragged to the other side by fox It's the way of life _._._

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Two muffins are baking in an oven. One of them says, "Man, it sure is hot in here." and the other muffin replies, "Yep." They later die a horrid and painful death as their flesh gets burned into a nice golden brown crisp.

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Why did the slut suck a dick? Because she's a slut.

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Boxing on Boxing Day

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What did the chair say to the fan? Nothing. Chairs and fans are objects so they do not have the physical ability to talk.

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What do you call a green dog? A green dog.

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Jack: Hey, you know what sucks? Jill: Vacuums Jack: Hey, you know what sucks in a metaphorical sense? Jill: Black holes Jack: Hey, you know what just isn't cool? Jill: Lava?

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Roses are red Violets are blue I suck at poems nice tits

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how many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop 397, IF you have a big tounge

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How much signal does an Asian woman need to cut across 4 lanes? None

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Roses are red Violets are blue I look down My pants are brown.

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Q.Whats the difference between a black guy and a bench? A.One is a human and the other is an inanimate object used to give people a rest.

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why dont they make black forks

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Whats the difference between right and left? I stabbed your mom with my left hand.

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The stone said to tree I wanna be car the tree replied you cant be a car. Forever a stone

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What's the hardest part about watching a 2 year old get hit by a bus? Trying not to laugh.

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If you don't see banners here, it doesn't mean they are not there...

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Why did they bury the firefighter behind the hill? Because he was dead.

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why did your mum die young because she had canser

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What do we call the science of classifying living things? Racism

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops