I viewed the terms of service and did not agree to them.

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What's worse then getting socks on Christmas? Being murdered by a bear.

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What did the fish say to the Asain man Nothing. a fish can not talk

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Q: how do you test the sharpness of a knife A: stab someone MR

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Roses are Red Violets are blue Shut up I'm watching Re-runs of FRIENDS.

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What looks like a rainbow but isn't seen in the sky? A drawing of a rainbow

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. They then proceed to bake into tasty pastries which are then eaten for snacks or maybe a light breakfast.

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Q: How do you measure a ruler A: You don't.

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Okay, hundred billions, and because I am fucking hungry, we make it perpetual, now the longer you keep the feeling going, the stronger and stronger and you know, trillions, indefillions, nondecillions, hell, make up your own numbers and just consider them higher. Bet its starting to feel pretty nice huh?

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because six cheated on seven and slept with nine.

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Yo momma so ugly, she couldn't fulfill her dream of being a model.

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Doesn't matter, had sex. Except for the STD's I possibly contracted.

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a lollipop? 782

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-Knock Knock -Who's there? -Jehovah's Witness. Have you heard the word of God?

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How can you know your roommate is gay? His dick has the taste of shit

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What does a frog in a blender sound like? *WWWRRRRRRRBFFFFZZZZZCHWEEERRRRRR*

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What's worse than tripping over your shoelace? Watching your mother get her tits cut off with a chainsaw then getting ripped apart and eaten alive by cannibals

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What's the difference between an apple and a baby. An apple is a fruit. A baby is a human being.

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NASA sent a probe to Uranus and wondered why people were laughing.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To distract everyone from the Mexican.

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Have You Ever Seen Stevie Wonder's New House? No.. Neither Has He.

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Who doesn't love finding money in your pocket when you go to put your pants on? a rape victim

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What did the facial stylist charge Jack Sparrow to get his ears pierced? A buc-an-ear!

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What magical power enables Spongebob to talk? There is no magical power. he is a cartoon therefore making him be able to anything in anyone's wild dreams.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops