How many plumbers does it take to unscrew a lightbulb? Plumbers don't do that. Electricians do.

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what is worse finding a worm in your apple? Finding a grub in your apple.

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Yo Mama is like a gas station:pump and pay.

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Why did the little girl fall from the swing? She's got no arms.

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How do you get a Mexican's attention? "Excuse me, may I have your attention?"

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What do Barney and a butchers knife have in common? One of them is purple

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Two girls are in a car together. The one in the drivers seat is texting while driving. The girl in the passengers seat notices this and tells her the she should put it away in case of a risk of a collision. She apologizes and puts it away and the two of them drive to the store unharmed and continued their normal day.

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Why does Magic Johnson have to use extra-large condoms? Because he's got a giant dick and HIV.

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The boy said to the priest, may God be with you. The priest responded with, "And also IN you".

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What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? Robin, get in the car.

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Big feet on a man means he has, Nothing, a man's foot size has no relation to the size of his penis.

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What should you do if you have a 10 inch penis? Subtly tell the world via an anti-joke

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Your mom is so black, i shot a bullet at her. It came back and said i need a flashlight.

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How many electricians does it take to change a lightbulb? No seriously, I don't know because we've only just got electricity in our village.

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Why did Justin Bieber cross the road? Because the chicken chose him as a decoy.

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I was sitting in traffic the other day. I was runover.

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A horse walks into a bar. The horse says "why the short face?"

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What is stupid, black and high? A stupid black kite.

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Why did the first Monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the second Monkey fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first Monkey. Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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What do you do if your walking into a room full of Lions and Jaguars? You stop walking.

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why couldnt the jew play basketball? He was handicapp

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Where do you8 find a dog with no legs? right where you left it

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A man walks into a pet shop. He says to the shopkeeper, "Excuse me, do you have any dogs going cheap?" The shopkeeper replies "We feel that we price our animals reasonably, but the cheapest type of dog we have is £50." The man realises that, unfortunately, he cannot afford a dog so instead he purchases a goldfish. It wasn't the same.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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