Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he lost his grip on the branch and was unable to reach another before reaching the ground.

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Aodhan Hearty

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There once was a genie With a sevenfoot weenie And he went to the lady next door She thought it was a snake So she hit it with a rake And then he murdered the shit out of her.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because after death the body loses control of muscles and the monkey could no longer grasp the branch with his tail

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Your mom is so fat that her BMI is in the morbidly obese column.

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Why did the chicken cross the road To go to KFC

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar..... Wait..... How?

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What did the sexually promiscuous man get for Christmas? AIDS.

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Two scientists are experimenting with sulfuric acid. One scientist says to the other, "Did you see the new intern?" In the process of turning to face the first scientist, the second scientist knocks the beaker over and spills sulfuric acid all over the first scientist's hand. The first scientist writhes in pain as the second scientist rushes to find a strong base to neutralize the burn. After a few minutes, the first scientist is rushed off to the emergency room and suffers from some serious chemical burns.

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Knock Knock COME IN!!!!

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why did the arrow hit the knee? the same reason pigs cant fly.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Somebody call animal control, there's a horse in the bar." The horse is then taken away and made into glue and dog food.

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your amazing just the way you are... even though you have aids.

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Q. Where do polar bears vote? A. The North Poll

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" I can't here you it's too dark!"

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Q: Why is 6 afraid of 7? A: Because 7 killed 6's family

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What do you get when you mate an elephant with a rhino? Not much of anything except inter-species animal sex, considering the fact that the two do not share enough genetic material to create any sort of offspring.

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When life gives you lemons. You make beef stew. #andymilinokis

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Well, this is fun.

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Dani Barton = Stupid

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Two black guys walk into a bar. Bartender asks them what they want to drink.

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What time is it? 10:58

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have a finger And the middle ones for you

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have clamidia Because Polly shat on me.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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