Two peanuts are walking down a dark alley. One was a honey roasted.

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Q: How many babies does it take th paint a barn? A: I dunno, how hard are you throwing them?

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a 12 year old walks into a bar she orders a drink and dies she then walks out of the bar

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What is pink and fluffy? Pink Fluff.

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He didn't. He slowly ate it on a warm day although it's taste was somewhat of a disappointment.

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Your mom.

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A man runs over a woman wth his car. Whose fault was it? The man because he should be driving on the roads, not in the kitchen.

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What's that smell? Your grandmother being burned alive.

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why did the chicken cross the road? who knows, we cannot read an animals (or a human for that matter) mind. Perhaps, though unlikely as he's a chicken, he saw a friend across the road or a child who wants to stroke him. Perhaps he is trying to escape being used as a circus act or being cooked for a supermarket. We cannot complain if the chicken wishes for a better life. Anyway, we shall never know why the chicken decided to cross the road, and never will, as it is dead after being hit by a car.

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yo momma is so fat her doctor recommended a new healthy diet.

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your amazing just the way you are... even though you have aids.

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A blind woman walks into a bar... she stands there confused because she is blind and can't tell what going on.

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Why did the rooster chase the chicken? - They were playing tag!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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How many Jews does it take to change a lightbulb? 1, just because their Jewish doesn't mean their incapable of changing a lightbulb.

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Were you born yesterday? Because I've got an erection...

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live babies

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An Englishman, Irishman and Scotsman walk into a bar. It happens frequently at UK airports.

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What is brown and tasty? A brownie.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick

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Andrew Wang getting a girlfriend.

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What did the boy with no arms get for Christmas? Gloves.

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Q:why didn't billy go to soccer practice A:there was a billboard stapled to his neck

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Q: What happened when Timmy divided by zero? A: He got a syntax error.

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Why did Lebron leave Cleveland? It's a terrible place to live.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops