Q: how do you get an clown off a unicycle A:You hit it with a police baton

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Feel free to call me, forget the money, as for my fucking eye, I just sure as hell hope those responsible are rotting in prison. I mean I just lost an eye right? Just kidding, I am the one who has been dead wrong here, I judged you wrong, I am the fuck that seems to feel responsible for the actions of others at times, then again I thought that you where sending them against me, they surely claimed they where, but fuck, people use all sorts of things and people as an excuse to do whatever the hell they want.

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? Ron Sparks.

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What's worse than the holocaust? nothing it was a terrible act in history

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What's worse than finding a worm in an apple? Finding out that your girlfriend is really a drag queen and that that is why you have never had sex. -Harrison

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Why did they bury the firefighter behind the hill? Because he was dead.

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Why was the boy put on his socks? So he wouldn't get blisters.

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Why couldn't the cat drink it's milk? Because it didn't have a face.

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Get on the boat.

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what did hellen keller name her dog? answer: unnumnumnum

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whats the difference between a dead baby and a watermelon? babies aren't fruit.

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What do you call a Mexican that is jumping off a building? A suicidal jumper!

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what is fun to eat but dumb when its alive? A dumb yummy candy

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What's the difference between Jews and pizza? One is an adherent to the religion of Judaism, and the other is a doughy bread topped with tomato sauce and cheese. They share virtually no similarities.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was a recovering alcoholic who recently relapsed and drove his car through his garage. He took his anger out on his wife and kids. His wife kicked him out and filed for divorce. Conveniently, the liquor store is across the street.

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Four gay men go to a bar and enjoy a drink celebrating their long lived platonic relationship.

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Why is it scientifically proven that even Spider-Man would be a match for Superman? Because none exist. Moral: The only Super Hero... not scientifically proven, but I exist so that makes me stronger than both of them!

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What's worse than 1 bee sting ? 2 bee stings What's worse than 2 bee stings ? the holocaust what's worse than the holocaust ? 3 bee stings

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What is Hellen Keller's favorite TV show? She doesn't have one - She is blind and deaf.

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"Wise old man, what is the meaning of life?" "I don't know why do people think old people are so wise these days?"

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I am the best i am the worst My wife was buried in hearse

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What did the black guy say to the white guy? Hi!

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Knock Knock! But nobody was home and couldn't hear it.

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Whats dark, has an opening, and guys like to go into it? A Vagina

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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