what do you get if you cross a motorway with a wheel barrow? Arrested as a wheelbarrow is not a motorised vehicle, or even a vehicle at all and therefore it is an offence to cross the motorway with it, actually it is probably an offence to cross a motorway with anything now that I come to think of it

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We are not even in the same country, and my eye becomes infected two times a minute or something so I wont be going anywhere. I mean, if you are some guy trying to be a girl in order to screw with me, let me first of all thank you for our exchange of ideas and concepts, and then say that if you are a guy, that likes other guys, then... Well, lets just say that if you are a man, that I don`t speak with men in general, takes away time I can spend with the ladies.

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A blonde runs into her house. She died in a tragic backdraft fire. Always check to see if the doorknob is warm.

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let me tell u a dirty joke a guy fell in the mud.

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Q. Why did Jimmy fall off his bike? A. Because he had alzheimer's and couldn't remember how to ride a bike.

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Knock Knock! "Use the friggin' doorbell!"

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Ask me if I'm a truck. Are you a truck? No.

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What's big white and can't fly? -Half of America Whats big brown and can't fly? -Crap

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Why are there so many blacks in prison? *The rest of this joke has been removed to avoid causing offence*

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chuck norris threw a grande and killed 50 people then the grande blew up

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What did the zen master say to the hot dog vendor? Make me one with everything,

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Why does a gay guy come out of the closet? He can't see anything inside.

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knock, knock Who's there? Statefarm... and we are always gonna be there for you

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Wow! I've seen this joke before!

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Why were there only 5,000 Mexicans at the Battle of Alamo? They only had 1250 trucks.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra. He is promptly arrested for sexual harassment.

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Caroline Kelly...Tight Butthole

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, My farts stink, And so do you.

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How did the cookie monster die? Diabidies

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How many electricians with a suitable ladder does it take to change a bulb? If the bulb fitting is now obsolete it may not be possible.

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Q. Why doesn't a woman need a wrist watch? A. Because they're actually becoming generally obsolete with the advent of the cell phone.

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How do you confuse a blonde? Paint yourself green and throw forks at her.

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What did the retarded guy say to the other retarded guy? Youre Retarded

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The schoolboy said to the bus driver, this is my stop the bus driver replied "no, we have a while to go yet"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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