Q: What's black and blue and is all over Timmy's mother? A: The bruises his father gave her when he came home drunk.

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What do you get when you cross two things that are seemingly unrelated? A play on words.

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How many chickens did Moses bring to the ark? 2

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How many midgets does it take to change a light bulb? If you do the math, it's probably one.

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What's worse than finding a real joke on anti-joke? Getting voted down to page 4067

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Where did jimmy go when the bomb exploded.... (Everywhere )

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What do you call a blue and black dot on the wall? A fly wearing blue jeans.

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whats the difference between a mexican and a bench? a mexican has elbows.

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I road a horse to school. My friend stabbed it with a Javelin and screamed.... The horse was his Dad

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Yes you better be sorry, I'm gonna suck my mums p e n i s tonight! - Dylan Hodge

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

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A blonde, redhead, and a brunette are chatting outside a casino. The brunette directs a joke towards the blonde. "What's the difference between cotton candy and pork chops?" The blonde has heard the joke prior to this encounter and correctly completes it with sign language because she is deaf.

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You wanna know what's totally out of this world? The moon.

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Two homosexuals walk into a bedroom, and begin to have sex.

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A boy is diagnosed with terminal cancer. His family prays for him and he still dies.

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what's worse then death? finding that your adopted, no one loves you and you mother raped you at the tender age of five.

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What do you get a kid with no arms for Christmas? Hungry, Hungry Hippos.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares, it's a chicken.

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I think my son might be gay. He's started to listen to Justin Bieber, and last week I walked in on him engaging in penetrative anal sex with one of his friends.

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In America you read books, but in Soviet Russia, it's exactly the same as it is in America, because it's not possible for books to read humans.

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What do you call Metta World Peace after he has hit somebody? Metta World War.

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What's the best thing about twenty three year olds? there are twenty of them

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Why did the little boy fall over. Because someone shot him in the face.

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what do you get when you cross a baby and a car a baby shaped dent, and a dead baby

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops