What does it mean when the drummer drools out of both sides of their mouth? That they may have had a stroke and you should immediately call 911.

What's red but smells like blue paint? Red paint.

what do you call a man that is hurt? A: you call him an ambulanse

The Piglodocus has been featured in films such as "Jurassic Pork" and "Land before Swine".

What did Chuck Norris say to the puppy? Aww what a cute dog.

A homophobic man walks into a bar and the bartender asks: "what can I get for ya?" the man replies: "shut up gaylord"

What do you call a child that has been stabbed? A dead child

A black guy and a Hispanic guy are in a car together. Who's driving? The black guy.

Guy 1: So how did you get into hospital Guy 2: I was drinking near my computer Guy 1: So why did it explode? Guy 2: (Doesn't reply)

Q: How did the man walk across the road? A: With his own 2 feet!

What did the kid with no arms and legs get for christmas? Cancer

What's more fun than throwing a dead baby off a cliff? Go-carts

Knock Knock, Who's there? Nobody..

sadf

Jesus, Mohammed, and Moses all walk into a bar. They sit down at a table and glare at each other before turning to watch the baseball game. They support opposing teams.

What do you call it when you have sex with a black man? Sex

Why was the Jew so happy? He had a good day

I liked your first album but I feel that it went downhill from there. There are a few good songs on your third album though.

What did one sausage say to the other? Nothing. Sausages don't talk...

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into an orange and finding a worm.

What did the black man say to the white man? "Hi"

A man sees another man standing at the edge of a tall bridge looking down. Man: Don't jump! No one wants you to die. You have your whole life to live and I'm sure you will find happiness somewhere. I was once in the same position as you, questioning if god really wanted me on this earth at all. But I decided to make something of myself and now I am a very successful business man. You can do the same if you just put your mind to it and put your troubles behind you. Other man: I was just admiring the view.

How do you make a sandwich? Go into the kitchen and make a sandwich.

My friend, who has struggled with a lifelong battle against anorexia, died yesterday..." "Oh my god, I'm so sorry!" "Yeah, me too. The car ran the stoplight and it was all over...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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