Q:Why did Sara fall off the swing? A: Because she has no arms. ..... Knock knock! who's there? Not Sara, she has no arms and doesn't have the abitlity to knock.

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What do you get when you cross a baby and a chainsaw? Life imprisonment.

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A horse walks into a bar and Shits John Taffer is Pissed

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What did the White guy say to the Black Guy? Nothing... he looked him up and down and spat at him instead.

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what do you call an animal thats black and white and red all over? an elephant

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What do you get when you stab a six year old with a pair of scissors and a machete? A very angry, potentially murderous mother out for revenge.

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How are baseball and basketball the same. They aren't football.

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What do you call a fridge painted red and brown? A fridge.

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The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft by pulling down on one or both of the red tabs.

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A fat black guy walks into a pet store and asks if he can have a chicken. The cashier says "what do you want a chicken for?" He says " I need to lose weight so I'm hoping to eat its all natural eggs" So the cashier gives him the chicken and the fat black guy lost 50 pounds.

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what do you say to your girlfriend just after the best sex you ever had? I really got great value for money tonight with my prostitute sweety. You should have been there

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Knock Knock Hold on Im pooping.

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So Superman walks into a bar right, WRONG, Superman flies into bar

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Knock Knock Who's There The police, your under arrest.

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whats the diffrence 2 gay people and 1 gay person? A 1 person diffrence

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What did Voldermort say to harry potter? i raped you mum last night!

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Why did the women leave the kitchen? Because the The husband told her to...

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Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left it.

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How do you torture helen keller? Waterboard her.

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Bigfoot, the loch ness monster, and self-respecting Justin Beiber fans are all the same, your told they exist, it's not true.

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What's brown and smells of chocolate? Chocolate or something dipped in chocolate but that might also smell of something else - like bananas.

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Q. What do humans and jelly beans have in common ? A. Nothing.

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Why did the man cry himself to sleep at night? Because the doctors gave him 3 months to live.

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Q: What happens when you divide by zero. A: You get a complex kind of infinite.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops