whats brown and rhymes with snoop? Dr. Dre

What is the difference between a woman and a whale? One has big whiskers and is fat and filthy, the other one lives in the sea and is a mammal

Your moma so ugly she should go see a plastic surgeon.

How many retards does it take to screw in a lightbulb? No number of them could figure it out. They sit in the dark for hours, scared of the monsters.

Why do chickens have feathers? Because chickens are birds and birds have feathers.

A little boy went to a sleep over . They watched a episode of pokemon and the flashing lights triggered the boys epilepsy he was driven to hospital and is recovered.

Once a upon a time there was a girl named Cinderella. She rubbed a magic lamp and a genie appeared. Then a guy named Larry Harry walks into a laundry mat. 7 days later she died.

What do you call a chicken? You say bawk bawk bawk bawk cockadoodledoo

Why did the man have no friends? He stabbed an innocent woman and is now rotting in prison.

What's long, dark, and smelly? The unemployment line.

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Poker Face

"You just went and made a new dinosaur?" "And due to its well-developed core muscles the staff behind Jurassic World has called it - 'ABDOMINUS PEX'." "That's a stupid name."

why Is the teen's sock crusty? he stepped in the glue that his little sister was using for her art project.

why did the man ride the helicopter,because he was hurt horrible in a car accident.

How am I supposed to eat soup without an envelope?

1. The name of your street 2. The name of your pet 3. Your favorite activity 4. The color of your eyes 5. The number of shoes you own Now fill in the blank with the corresponding number to your answers. "One day I was ___3___ my dog when a pornstar named __(1)__ ___(2)___ asked me how many times I can ___(3)____ myself. I said ___(5)___ times and the juice that came out of me was __(4)___."

What do you call a person who kills there own child? Casey Anthony.

why cant the blind man read brail? he has no fingers

womens rights.

sit in the dark for about 4 or 5 hours covered in Vaseline with a huge dildo inside of your arse

Why did the girl fall off of the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

John has 37 candy bars and eats 36 of them? What does John have? Diabetes, John has Diabetes.

In soviet Russia...things are different

A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. The priest has his papers but the rabbi is sent to a concentration camp.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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