Q: What did hitler say to his generals? a: In a circumstance as the one we have found ourselves in. Eliminating our most threatening of enemies would be very logical. Unless they were of the superior race therefore, it may be frowned apon by our low ranked comrades. Causing another assasionation attempt on myself. So in conclusion I believe eliminating a rich and intelligent race far more superior than our own, would be the best way to go. So collect the Jews of Warsaw and we might have a chance.

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Q: How do you do to get an elephant down from a tree? A: Wait for the fall when the leaves start falling you shoot it down.

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What is the difference between 100 dead babies and a ferrari? You can't find a ferrari in my garage.

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How did the man want his hair cut? In silence.

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In retrospect, I was wrong to microwave all those cats.

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Her hair was fine, her scent was great, now show me your fucking ****.......please

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haiku for you ladies and gents My mother once said, "Slow and steady wins the race" She died in a fire.

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Knock knock: Who's there: Woo: Woo Who: I knew you'd be glad to see me.

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What does the fox say? Nothing a fox is incapable of speech.

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Bridget, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and since it is rather long, it brushes against her round breasts. Even though she is a little sweaty, you realize what a beautiful woman she is, and you decide not to kill here. You instead ask her to marry you, and after she replies "yes", with tears of joy streaming down her face, you two make passionate love in the front seat of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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Why did the boy fail the math test? He has a learning disability.

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it

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Why did the boy fail his maths test? He had no eyes due to a vicious bear attack earlier that year so couldn't read the questions or study from books resulting in him not being able to complete the task he was given.

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What did the fat black man do? Get a gym membership.

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whats worse than 9/11? not much haaaa

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What do you call a black guy who wins a race? A winner

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What's smelly and Dirty? Someone who hasn't shower in a reasonably long time.

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What's red and can't find a family? A fire hydrant

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jim davidson , nick griffin , and bernard manning walk into a bar , and order a bitter, a lager, and a stout respectfully

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What do you hear when you put your foot on a man's ear? A man saying, "WTF are you doing?!"

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What's black and hangs from trees in my backyard? Nothing. Blackberries grow on bushes and I do not condone hate crimes.

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A man walks into a bar and orders a strong drink Bartender: Why the long face Man: My wife was recently killed in a horrible car accident Bartender: Oh my god, I'm so sorry Man: Jks I have AIDS

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Despite their parents wishes, two teenagers under the age of 18 tried multiplying. Their answer was 27.

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How do you make etheopians rave ? glue bread to the roof

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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