John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt has a really long name.

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roses are red violets are blue i done your mom and i do you too

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Why can't Heller Keller drive? Because she was blind.

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Why did the boy run a marathon? because one of his good friends had just earlier passed away from pancreatic cancer and he decided to honor his memory by raising money through a 5k run. His family, friends and acquantances were all very proud of him and decided to hold the charity every year.

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How do you get a Jew to jump off a cliff? You kidnap his family and threaten to kill them if he doesn’t.

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How do you kill a baby swinging on a rope attached to a pole at 40 miles an hour? Hit it with a shovel.

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This isn't funny.

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A bra walks into a dyslexic man.

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Why didn't the scientist discover a cure for apathy? He simply lost interest in it.

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If the human population held hands around around the equator A significant portion of them would drown.

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Why did george washington not make it to the prom? because george washington is dead

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Q: how do u make a fireman cry? A: set his wife on fire

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What time is it in China right now? I have no idea, it would depend on when you are reading this. Perhaps you should look at a world clock, watch, or some other sort of time-telling device rather than humorous website. Its purpose is not to tell time. However, there are many other places for this. Good luck surfing the web, friend. I have aided you the best that I can. I only hope that you will find what you are looking for.

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Q. Why did Obama cross the road? A. To collect taxes from the houses on the other side

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What do you call a cat in a piece of bred? An inbred cat.

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what do you call a mexican in a coffee shop? a customer and/or worker in the coffee shop.

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How did the man die? He was killed alive.

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Why are you gay? Because ***** you

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Why did the boy fall off the bike? Because he was a paraplegic.

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A Jew was walking home one night when two thugs leapt out of the darkness and demanded his money and other possessions at gunpoint. A reflection of how dangerous our streets can be at night.

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What's red and can sing? Elmo

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A: WHERE'S MY TRACTOR?!

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Your Mom is so fat, that she went to the doctor's and they told her that she was overweight and needed to get a stomach staple in order to make her lose weight

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My great grandfather died in a concentration camp. The poor guy fell off the guard tower.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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