How do you keep an idiot in suspense? You watch a suspenseful TV program and pause at the right moment.

How many cows does it take to screw in a light bulb? Either one super cow or none because cows don't even have apposable thumbs

Q: How many hair styles do celebreties induce annualy? A: I have no clue but I'm pretty sure that's a midget defacing your house!

Q: whats funnier than watching a black man and a midget fight? A: anything technically, your opinion

Are you thinking Arby's? No. My grandmother died of tuberculosis and it's troubling me.

I AM SHOWERING IN THE BLOOD AND ORGANS OF ENDORPHIN RUSH IN ORDER TO APPEASE THE GODS KNOWN AS... ME, MYSELF, AND I!

Why is it so hard to cook vegetables? The wheel chair won't fit in the oven.

Yesterday i ate an owl with all the feathers on it

gabe sucks 8-------------------D~

Whats bigger than a tree A bigger tree

Yo mama so fat, that she's even bigger than the universe!

How do you turn a dishwasher into a snowblower? Give her a shovel

Wake up in the morning feeling like... Helen Keller

Jet fuel doesn't melt steel beams,heat does.

A man walks into a sofa. BANG

Have you seen the newest starwars? What movie? I mean that episode where stars fight... Will Smith vs Keanu Reeves? I am talking about the stars in the sky firing at each other! You know, those star pilots on planes... Flown by Will Smith and Keanu Reeves? BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM! (You heard that one in your head)

Naturally I meant to say "Its no fun even when they DO scream in pain" below... What do you think I got? Pleasure? Your friendly r*pist Moral Man: Of course I got pleasure! ;) But I wont share with you!

What is terrible and doesn't exist? This joke's punchline,

What are the first three words in a Mexican Cook Book? Steal a chicken.

What was a hard time for people? the great depression

what happened to the little kid on a bicycle? Nothing

Theres a tomatoe a cucumber and a mouth. HA

An American, a Mexican and a Cuban are in a car. For they are heading to the store to buy groceries and then come home to make dinner.

How do you get Suzy to get off the swing? Ask her to move.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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