Knock Knock. Who's there? Scott Scott who? Scott Henderson. Oh my god Scotty! I haven't seen you since highschool, please come in.

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what do you call when a penis is inside a vagina? sex

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How do you tell the difference between Lila and derrek ashmore? Oh wait they both have vaginas

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Why did the clown's ballon animal pop? He was a victim in a drive by shooting.

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Why would Bill Clinton like Jess so much? Cause he has a vagina, smells like shit, and has cankles.

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Why does Tim Teblow love men? Logan Cole told him to.

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What did the driver have when he got hit by another car? An accident.

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If I could slow down time I would have become a super criminal or something, no, my movements become slower also, ever heard of a game Max Payne? The character can slow down his perception of time and still aim his gun normally while he himself moving at the same speed as the rest. I well... when time seems to go slower, my thoughts do not, so yeaaah, Except my fast reactions also make me wear myself out faster to the point where I got injured a lot as a kid, like smacking my wrist against arcade games and stuff, broke my wrist, as a teen, still hurts when it rains, yeah weird but true.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a bigger worm in your apple.

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What did the little boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer What did he get the next year? Nothing he didn't make it that far

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Knock knock It's open, come in

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Fat? Jesse Z

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What did the man say to his friend? Hello.

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Believing in God may be a sign of autism Kappa

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What falls down but never gets hurt? A professional stuntman wearing protective gear.

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What happens when you throw a red rock into a purple river? It gets wet...

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What's black, green, and doesn't have to take a shower? I have no idea.

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How do you know an elephant has gotten into your refrigerator? The refrigerator is lying on its side and the door is ripped off. The food is all over the place and the shelves are scattered around the floor. Your house will have suffered severe structural damage that insurance plan might not cover. Also there is a mortified elephant in you kitchen.

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What has two legs and is red all over? Half a dog.

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what did batman say to robin before they got in the car get in the car

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How did little Tommy die? i pushed him into the deep end of the pool

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What does a female Nazi call a tampon? A twatskika.

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What's worse than Twilight? New Moon. What's worse than New Moon? Eclipse. What's worse than Eclipse? Breaking Dawn. What's worse than Breaking Dawn? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Breaking Dawn Part 2.

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What did the towel say to the other towel? Nothing, there was no topic of conversation.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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