Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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What do you get when you cross a rhino and a whale? Comment your answer:

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A: What dose God listen to? B: Slayer. A: Trick Question, God=Slayer

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on a planet, in a galaxy, far far away... you have cancer

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What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

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my brother yells at me for singing in the shower so i scream "how can you hate from outside the tub when you cant even get in?"

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whats red and hard to eat a brick.

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A man walks into a doctors office. The doctor says "I've got good news and bad news. Which do you want first?" The man responds "Let's have the good news." The doctor says "I ran a series of tests and found you have leukemia, but your insurance paid for everything." Shocked, the man asks "What's the bad news?" The doctor answers "Your company is switching to a private insurer and because of your pre-existing condition you're being denied coverage. None of your future treatments will be covered."

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? One is a bottom-feeding scum sucker, and the other is an advisor who assists people by representing them on legal matters.

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Wha'ts the difference between Justin Beiber and a piece of hot muff garbage? Fart triscuits.

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Why do zebras have stripes? I don't know.

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Roses are green. Violets are purple. Charlie Sheen. Looks a turtle.

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What's brown and slimy? brown slime

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Hey, you why you say poo poo nae nae watch me whip, and do the dougie, and then happy halloween? Potato Salad

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A man walks into a library and asks to borrow a book on suicide The librarian gives him permission and he leaves the library with the book in hand.

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Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? Because pterodactyls along with all other dinosaurs have been extinct for millions of years.

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Why does Rupert the Bear wear chequered trousers? Because that's how the creator originally drew him.

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A man is at the doctor's office and the doctor says to the man: "I'm sorry sir, you have AIDS and Alzheimer's disease." The man says: "Well, at least I don't have AIDS!"

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why did the bear cross the road? to get cream cheese.

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what has a hard shaft and an even harder head? A hammer

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Why was the Mexican lucky to have a job? Due to the failing economy, lack of available jobs, and amount of people getting laid off, it was considered lucky to have a job.

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would you rather harry styles my dick have harry styles suck my dick or both of you style on my harry dick?

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Why was the guy not asleep Because he was awake

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Why did the black person jump the fences? because he was in a relay race.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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