One day a priest walked into a prison to bring lost souls to the Lord.....Not his best idea.

What do you call a horny blond on the corner? A prostitute

Why did ben 10's omnitrix or watch break? Because he kept slapping it.

Why is a dog smarter than a human? Because you an asshole if you believe me

- Pete and Repeat are in a boat. Repeat falls off, who's left? - Pete? - F**k yes.

Whats red and bad for your teeth??? A brick!!!

What dd the man say to his wife? Make me a samich!

how do yopu punish helen keller? Ground her, just like you would with any other child.

What do you call a black man on the moon?? Never going to happen

I would tell you a joke about a pencil but there would be no point.

A man goes and buys a head of cabbage. The cabbage had a worm in it. When the man saw the worm, he threw out the cabbage and bought a new one the next time he went to the grocery store.

What did the Christian say to the atheist? "Even though we don't share the same beliefs, I think it's great that we can still be good friends."

How do you keep children off your lawn? Touch them.

what do you call a white man in a black neighborhood a minority

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the farmer left the gait open.

A man accidentally chops his thumb off while preparing his dinner for the night. He immediately calls an ambulance and has his thumb preserved which is later reattached back onto his hand. He then continues his dream career as a solo pianist.

whats the difference between boyscouts and a jew? boyscouts come back from camp.

NeroChan, I have said nothing to you, that you have not taught me, if nothing else you have indirectly inspired yourself, you will get back on your feet, you just need to take one step at the time, I know how ambitious you are, but you always focused on helping others, hiding, seeing yourself as a sinking ship, trying to help as many as possible before you pass away. We can work trough this together, it is easy to figure out that you are trying to protect others from what you feel that you have become, something that cannot be repaired, something that was never meant to be fixed, but to be used until it had no more to give.

Well, I feel that I've stepped outside my comfort zone.

Why did the boy fall out of his seat? He was being strangled with a piano wire.

What did the hammer say to the screwdriver? You're a tool

Q: What is harder than cleaning off baby bloodstains off a wall? A: Cleaning multiple baby blood stains off a wall.

a cow walked into a bar and asked for a large whiskey on the rocks, 'long day, eh' said the barman, 'yes' replied the cow, 'first a large moving obstical was cutting down my food, and then my friend was raped from his milk.'

If I told you I was straight I'd be lying

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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