Yo momma is so dumb, the tests came back positive for mental retardation and she has been given an expected life expectancy of 2 years.

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A man got struck by a car and was rushed to hospital on life support, he died shortly after. His wife was informed of his death by the doctors and shortly after she killed her children and finally hung herself.

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Why did the man eat his cellphone? Because he has a serious mental disability, and did not know that it was not a normal thing to do, and for anybody to laugh at him for doing something like this is just a sick person.

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Whats worse than stubbing your toe? Obama being re-elected

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You're welcome. On to the next house.

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A platypus walks into a bar. Why is there a butter knife in my basement?

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Non-Anti-Joke.com!

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Pain is temporary. However, the scars from 3rd degree burns are forever.

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what did I say to myself nothing because its very weird to talk to your self

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There is my brain said the English man stop leaving it in the fridge and let me mug you now get in the car OK!

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What do you call a black guy who flys a plane? A pilot.

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What's even better than finding 10 bucks in your pocket? Getting into heaven.

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Doctor: You want the good news or bad news? Patient: Bad news. Doctor: You have terminal cancer. Patient: What's the good news? Doctor: You have AIDS.

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Stop looking at these jokes and go fuck yourself.

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What's the difference bettween the holocaust and a bee, 6 million jews died during the holocaust. Bees make honey.

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What do you say if you wake up and see your television floating around at night? Say,"I should probably get to sleep. This is probably an effect of sleep deprivation."

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your so fat. your fat!

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What did the doctor say to the person who is suffering from obesity? Run fatass Run

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Q: Why did Susie fall off the swing? A: She had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? Not Susie.

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what did the window say to the other window nothing they are both inanimate objects

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How many Polacks does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One. A person's ethnicity or country of origin, or religion for that matter, would have no bearing on one's ability to perform the relatively simple task of installing a light-bulb. Furthermore, there is no reason to use the negative slur 'polack' when referring to a person of Polish descent.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding out your Grandmother died.

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Two gophers are in a tank One of them says how the heck do you drive this thing?

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because it felt like it, now mind your own business!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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