What did God say when he made his first black guy? Oh no I burned one! :)

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how many jews does it take to fit in a mid-size sedan? -5 comfortably.

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What day is it today? Today. Thank you. You're welcome.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Can you sign for this package? Certainly

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Q:why is walmart so big? A:Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping and affordable low prices. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of Walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory .

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Knock Knock Who's There The police, your under arrest.

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the sky is green no it is not

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Q: How many burgers did little Johnny eat? A: Involuntary erections.

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What do an elephant and a can of soup have in common? They both can't ride a bike

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Why wouldnt you want to hit a black man that is on a bike with your car? It mite be your bike

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whats worse than getting raped by a giant scorpion? Gingers

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What do you call a person with an eye patch, no arms, and a mohawk? A person with an eye patch, no arms, and a mohawk.

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Q: What did the egg say to the boiling water? A: It'll take a while for me to get hard cause i just got laid by a chick(: hahah.

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What do you call 20 blondes in a freezer? dinner

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What do a software designer, a civil engineer, an airline pilot, and a long-distance swimmer's support team have in common? All of them use angles and trigonometric ratios to help solve problems.

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A Jew walks into a gas chamber...

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I touch myself at night.

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When is a Jewish persons bedtime? When the brain releases endorphins, causing drowsiness, which usually leads one to sleep.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it got run over on the way there.

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Why was the baby crying? Because he was tied to a railroad track. How did the baby die? He had a bomb strapped to him. How did the bomb explode? It got ran over by a train.

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What's black, white and red all over? A nun that fell down a flight of stairs

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What came first... the chicken or the egg? How am I supposed to know?

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Q: What would happen if Chuck Norris was hit by an Astroid A: He would die.

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A shoemaker walks into a bar holding a shoebox with only one shoe inside. The bartender gives him a drink and asks "Say mister, why are you carrying that shoebox with one shoe?" The shoemaker says "Well sir, it's a long story." The bartender says "Okay, give me the short version." The shoemaker says "Okay, long story short, I'm not really a shoemaker." The bartender asks "Well buddy, what are ya?" The shoemaker gets up from his chair and says "I'm a guy missing shoe."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops