How does Helen Keller play the piano? With one hand.. She needs the other hand to sing.

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How do you discover a gay snowman? If the carrot is in the ass.

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jacob mckeand broke his arm and now he cant wank :(:(:(

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How do you fit 100 dead babies in a box? A blender. How do you get them out? Tortilla Chips. hehehehehehe

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Yo momma is so fat that she is overweight

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Roses are red , violets are blue, you like 1d? STFU

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What did the man think as the foul baseball flew rapidly toward his face? Oh man, I thought my tickets were to an NBA game.

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How did the chewy cross the road ? it was stuck to the chickens foot.

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Your mom's so fat, she's is bigger than the average person.

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What do you call a black airline pilot? An airline pilot.

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Omar the Magnificent is performing a huge magic show at a theater in New York City. His final trick will be to have his assistant saw him in half in front of the sold out crowd. Omar never knew how other magicians perform the trick. The crowd of hundreds watches Omar's assistant brutally murder him onstage and many require mental therapy for years to come.

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Why did the girl drop her cookie? She had no arms.

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What do you call a person with cancer A hospital patient, what did you expect? Oh. Of course you expected Chewbacca.

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What do a priest, a rabbi, and an asian have in common? They all don't know each other.

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When does a cat not land on its feet? When it has paws.

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An old friend of mine had an idea. "Socks, but for your hands." I laughed until the day I heard he died of chaffed penis.

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How did the boy fall off the swing? He got hit by a fridge

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What's the difference between being hungry and being horny? Where you put the cucumber

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Why didn't the 13 year old boy have any friends? He was autistic and didn't connect properly with people.

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Whats bigger than 'burger king'? A. burger

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How do you find the richest person in Mexico? You take a survey of all citizens that live in the country of Mexico, find the wealth of each individual person, and whoever has the most money is the richest person in Mexico.

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What was in the magical purple teapot? Two dying pelicans.

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What do chicken and babies have in common? They both taste like chicken.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Interrupting cow Interrupting cow wh- SHUT UP!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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