What did Goldilocks ask the Three Bears? Nothing, bears are aggressive mammals and killed her before she could speak.

So a train conductor is going at 70 mph to to a destination 50 miles away. He goes over 3 hills, one at 20 mph, the other 42 mph, and the last at 63 mph. He crosses 2 bridges at 47 mph each. What did the train conductors mom eat for dinner that night Nothing she had cancer and died.

Why was the Asian terrible at driving? He was drunk.

Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? It was probably a cold day.

Q:How do you get better at boxing? A:Get a bigger package Daniel W. Schnurr

why did the boat crash? a tomato was driving

A grammatically correct mushroom walks into a bar. The bartender says, "We don't serve mushrooms." The mushroom says, "Why not, I'm a fungus."

Knock knock. ... Knock knock. ... Knock knock. ... The FedEx man leaves, realizing that no one was home, and continues on with his job.

who is gay wit mon james cornish

Whats worse than a dead baby? Two dead babys.

Bill: Hey Bob guess what? Bob:What? Bill: your adopted

Knock Knock... Who's there? JUST LET ME IN!

There is a mom a dad and a son, they walk into the museum and the dad is in the bathroom.

Parents were talking about a particular whore house and tries to keep it secret to their son. Father: Bob and I saw the house near the river, its a whore house full of prostitutes. Mother: Shhh! Our son is listening. The Son enters the room. Son: Don't mind me, I know that area. Both parents were angry: So you've been there!? Don't deny, you know! Son: Just because I know doesn't mean I've been there. I know the moon has less gravity but I haven't been there.

How do you get down from a horse?? You don't... You get down from a duck.

How many Woman does it take to change a lightbulb? none they had a back up lamp

What's small, black and at the top of a burning building? Oh shit - I forgot my baby

Whats the difference between the NBA and the WNBA? NBA players make more, have more fans, and play a real sport.

Why did the blonde tattoo her zip code on her stomach? She wanted a tattoo.

How do you make a little girl cry twice? Rub your bloody dick on her teddy bear

Whats worse than the death of a celebrity? An anonymous person posting a joke on this site.

What's worse then the WNBA? Nickelback.

What's worse than 9/11? a dipped glass of milk

Where did the girl go when a bomb was dropped on her? Everywhere

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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