Why are there cookie's in the jar? 'Cause I put cookies in the jar

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How often does the lesbian vampire group meet up? Never. Lesbians don't exist.

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What did the doctor say to his patient? You have AIDS.

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What's just not right? Left

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What did the Dark Knight say to the Policeman? I'm Batman

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Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms... Why couldn't sally get up? She had no legs Why did no one help sally? Because she has no friends.

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Why did the black man buy fried chicken? Because it wasn't free.

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What do you call a jewish person at a construction site? A builder

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Why was lil' Susie screaming horrifically? Nobody knows. That's why the neighbors called the cops. -Harrison

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What's worse than getting dumped? Heart Failure.

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What is the worse joke to tell a Orpahn Knock Knock Whos there not your parents

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Your mom is so fat, she went to the hospital, and they intern, turned her exess fat into 12 babies.

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A wise man once said, "I am wise".

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What did the drunk man say to his wife? "I love you, Honey"

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When life gives you lemons You've got some lemons.

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What did the caninibol do when he duped his girlfriend He wiped

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How many Babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends how hard you throw them

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Shltskc gw? G

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What is grey and transparent? An elephant in a zip-lock bag.

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What's better than winning gold in the special olympics? Not being retarded.

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What's red and looks like a bucket? A red bucket. What's blue and looks like a bucket? A red bucket in disguise.

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Timmy needed to use the restroom in class, so he raised his hand and asked, "Can I go use the restroom?". The teacher said " I don't know, CAN you?" Timmy said, "When I was using "can" I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier asking for permission, as opposed to expressing an ability. I thought since you were a teacher you'd know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?"

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Why do girls wear makeup and perfume? Because they are ugly and they stink.

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What's green and eats nuts? Syphilis.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops