What do you call a two headed platypus? Go ask him, I'm sure he has a name.

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A man walks into a bar with a chicken on his head the bartender asks the man why do you have a chicken on your head the man replies the chicken is thirsty

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A man and a bird are on the edge of a cliff. The man falls off and dies and the bird flies away because birds can fly and people can't.

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Three Jews walked into a bar. I lied... it was a gas chamber.

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Roommate 1: I want to make food but I'm not going to Roommate 2: Why not? Roommate 1: Because I'm tired and lazy.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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Doctor: Why the long face? Elephant Man: That's not my face that's a tumor.

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Many people dont know this about me, but I'm not very famous.

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A fully grown cow walks into a man's house and says to him, "Hey, how have you been?" Traumatized by the vivid circumstances, the man falls to the floor and begins sobbing relentlessly until he passes out onto the floor from a violent mental breakdown.

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What do you call a midget driving a train? A conductor

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two mexicans are in a car, who's driving one of the mexicans!!!

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So a ninja walks into a bar and he sees a cowboy and the ninja says i will kill you with my mad ninja skills and the cowboy says who needs mad ninja skills when you got a gun

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Q: What's worse than not having a good relationship? A: Starving Africans

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2 muffins were in the oven when one turned to the other and said. "Damn it's hot in here" The second muffin looked at him with a shocked expression and exclaims "She's burning the potatoes!"

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What does a gay horse eat? Carrots

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Why can't Benitio Mussolini win the war? Becuase he's dead.

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A man takes a bite into a tuna casserole and burns his tounge. He is also a hermaphradite.

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What did the calculator screen say? Cos0=1

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what do mexicans cross? whatever they want. but in this case their local grocery store parking lot to buy fresh produce.

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What has four legs and a tail? A table with a tail

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Why did the family sue disney? Because at a meet and greet location mickey mouse shot their youngest in the heart.

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A clown attends a childs birthday party. He molests 4 children and kills the others. Then leaves.

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"I see London; I see France..." "Wow. You must have exceptional eyesight."

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Everybody love food when they are hungry

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops