Why did suzy not eat her breakfast? because i stapled her to the table.

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Q: Why was the little boy late for school? A: His face was stapled to a wall.

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Why did Julie fall off a swing? 'Cause she had no hands. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Julie, that's certain.

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How many blondes does it take to change a light bulb? All of them.

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What's brown and sticky? ...A stick.

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Whats the difference between a nigro and a nigro... They are both BLACK!

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Why was the boy scared? Well, his mother had recently taken up Satanical ideals and in an attempt to sacrifice themselves to the Dark Lord, she drove her car off a cliff and into a lake. Now, with his dead mother in the drivers seat, no way to call emergency services, and 300 feet of water between him and the surface, you can see why he'd be scared.

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A: what did one apple say to the other apple. B: Nothing apples cant talk

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You know what they say about a man's feet... No i don't.

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Why was the boy sad? Because his pet bird couldn't fly. Why couldn't the bird fly? Because it was dead.

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A blonde dies Lololol

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Why couldn't jack join the football team? Jack has down syndrome

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Good friends are like snowflakes. They disappear when you pee on them.

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how do you prevent a chicken from contracting aids?? you make him a little chicken condom.

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Anti-jokes are funny.

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So the word RAPING does not work unless you type it in caps? Raping... Did it censor? No? Never mind then... Wow, catchphra Never mind... Its a sign X-files theme.... Teleports at your house: Hah bitch never you ugly, or not ugly enough... Urgh, nevermind, I mean some ugly chicks know their stuff but you know... Anyway NeroMetal The sociopath not the fucking Cultist piece of shit that use my morals as a code system? YOU THINK WE THE SAME? EEEEEEH! Me raping you says we are not... And ill find you ;) Or your sister or your mom, I mean h0m0? You think im a pervert or something?

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What was funny about the Halocast? Nothing, thousands of innocent people died

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Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? It was probably a cold day.

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Two muffins are sitting in a oven, The other muffin says to the other muffin nothing, Because muffins are unable of human conversation.

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Your mom is so fat that she saw a school bus full of white children and , thought "I can hardly even remember a time when my body used to be slim." She now keeps track of her diet and exercises regularly,the result of this has been a weight loss of over 95 pounds.

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Why do Jews have such large noses? Hereditary genetics.

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What's black white and red all over A Nun after being pushed down the stairs

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Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock, whos there? Not sally

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Why did the crossing guard drop his whistle? Because a kid got hit by a passing elephant.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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