Why is six afraid of seven? Six isn't actually afraid of seven. It is true that seven devoured nine's carcass, but one has to understand that cannibalism is not a taboo in their culture. In the world of cardinal numbers, protein is precious and leaving corpses to rot is dangerously unsanitary. You should not judge them by the standards of human society. It's ignorant and offensive.

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Why did the boy jump off the building? To get to the bottom.

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How many days can a pelican whisper? Pelicans can't whisper.

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"bus driver pressed the horn at my mum and she stuck a finger up at him " Not the first time she's got the horn and shoved a finger up

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Q: What do you call a serial killer named Mark? A: Mark.

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What do you call cheese that's mine? My cheese

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A guy walks into a bar and orders a glass of water. A few seconds later he drinks the water.

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What's the difference between your dog and your mother? Your dog doesn't think you're a disgrace to the family

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Whats worse than getting hit by a bus? Getting hit by two busses.

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Why did the magician die when he tried to escape from the handcuffs underwater? Because he drowned and failed his magic trick.

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Why are anti jokes not funny.... Because they make sense.

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Wuy are Kenyans so fast? Because due to variations in evolution, people from that part of the world have a better muscle build to run at higher speeds than equally trained athletes from other parts of the world.

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what do u call a joke with no punchline? A non-harmful joke

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How do you know if a woman is cheating on you? If you catch her cheating on you

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Q: What's the difference between Rush Limbaugh and the Hindenburg? A: One is a huge, flaming, Nazi gasbag, and the other is a drug-addicted talkshow host.

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Got a card in the mail from my estranged uncle today. Yep.

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How do you tell if a politician is lying? You make him take a polygraph test.

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Why did the 15 year old commit suicide? Because his parents and 3 sisters died in a car accident and he went to live with his uncle, who constantly raped him.

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Yo momma so ugly..... what more do you want

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What would you call a two-foot Irishman named Max? Max.

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How do you stop a dog from humping your leg? Suck its dick.

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Whats the difference between a bench and a black man? A bench is an inanimate object incapable of speech, emotion, or thought process.

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What happened to the frog that broke down? It got toad.

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A man was walking home when a little boy ran up to him. He said "hey mister, how do you sleep apples?" Then the man wasn't sure why he asked him so he spelled it out for him "that's easy my boy, A-P-P-L-E" the little boy said "you said pee pee!" Then he laughed and ran off

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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