What's brown and wears glasses? A poo with bad eyesight.

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What do you call a man with 3 legs and one arm jumping on a trampoline? By his name.

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A baby seal walks into a club

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Knock Knock COME IN!!!!

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What do you call a used garden tool? A dirty hoe (not ho)

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If life gives you melons ... You might be dyslexic

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why didn't the kid win the talent show? He wasn't talented.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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A man went in for a doctors appointment and said, "Doc, it hurts when I do this." The doctor responded, "Try to abstain from from putting stress on that area. It might alleviate the pain a bit."

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Why did the depressed man complain about life? He didn't he committed suicide.):

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Why did German shower heads have eleven holes? Because jews only have ten fingers.

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An asian kid in a classroom starts to squint to try to see the board that is far away. A white man looks at the kid and asks, "Hey asian, is it hard for you to see that board?" The Asian replies, "Yes, yes it is."

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how do you make a plumber cry kill his family

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A guy walks into a bar. The bartender says "what do you want to drink" the guy says "a blue moon"

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Why shouldn't women wear watches? Because there's a clock on their cell phones.

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Roses are red Violets are red Tulips are red Bushes are red Trees are red Fences are red OMG MY FENCE IS ON FIRE!

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What do you get when you mate an elephant with a rhino? Not much of anything except inter-species animal sex, considering the fact that the two do not share enough genetic material to create any sort of offspring.

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Why did the cat fall out of the tree? Cause the branch broke. Why did the baby fall out of the tree? Cause it was stapled to the cat.

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Why did the Russian take a boat ride? Well this isn't possible because we all know that in Soviet Russia, boat ride you.

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What's the difference between a duck? A vest has no sleeves.

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What do apples taste like? Apples.

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I have a left shoe. I have a right shoe. I have two feet

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"You know what they say about people with big swords." What do they say? Man that's a big sword.

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George W. Bush

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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