How do you kill Justin Beiber? By stabbing him 38 times in the chest.

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Are you 9/11 because i would like you to destroy my tower.

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What's funnier than an anti-joke? Sarcasm.

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What's the difference between a truck full of bowling balls and a truck full of babies? One's used for bowling and the other's just sad.

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What's the difference between an elephant and a plum? Their color. What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill. What did Jane say when she saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the plums over the hill. She was color blind.

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What happened when the princess kissed a frog. Warts, all over her lips

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Whats worse then the Holocaust? Chlamydia.

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Who's blind but can see, deaf but can hear, and dumb yet can solve the most complex mathematical equations? Helen Keller-Norris

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What's worse than requesting a three-some to your in-laws? Forgetting to suggest that they me too fragile and disabled, resulting in one of their limbs breaking.

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What do you call a man with no friends? Terry

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A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

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Sex education in Texas,

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What did the hispanic say to the black guy? I'm not sure. I wasn't listening because eavesdropping is rude.

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What do you say to somebody that wont shut up Shut up!!!!

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Black people in Camden NJ.

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what did the murderer say when he lost his gun? dangit. now i cant kill anyone

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What did the spatula say to the door handle? Nothing. Inanimate objects are incapable of speaking.

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what is funnier than a apple? a talking apple

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What's an example of something quiet? Helen Keller.

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Here comes the bride, all dressed in white. Here comes the groom, carrying a broom, because somebody spilled something on the floor.

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chuck norris once kicked a man verry hard that man proceded to lose contiosness and chuck norris was disqualified from the martial arts compatition

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my brother yells at me for singing in the shower so i scream "how can you hate from outside the tub when you cant even get in?"

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"Have you ever seen Stevie Wonder's parents?" "No" "Neither has he"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? because i was on the other side and we were going to catch a movie

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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