What's the difference between Jesus and a painting? It only takes one nail to hang up a painting.

Why did the woman make the man a sandwich? Because the man severed his spinal cord and is no longer able to move any of his limbs.

What happens when you mix bleach and ammonia? You eventually die of respiratory failure from inhaling chlorine gas and possibly an exploding toilet.

How many alcoholics does it take to change a light bulb? Look. I just enjoy a few drinks every now and then. I mean, I can quit whenever I want to. That's no reason to start people calling names.. Wait, no. That's not.. Look. How much do you drink every day, huh? Why not ask that? And why do I have to be the one changing your stupid light bulb? If it's sooooo important that the light bulb be changed, do it yourself, you lazy bastard. Don't rely on other people to do your work for you.

What's worse than finding a dead baby in a dumpster? Recognizing the baby as your missing child, and finding the corpse of your dead wife next to it.

jacob mckeand broke his arm and now he cant wank :(:(:(

Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left it.

Whats worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into a worm and finding an apple.

what do you call an octopus with 9 tentacles? a male octopus

So Superman walks into a bar right, WRONG, Superman flies into bar

Tyrone is innocent! I can't wait until Kirsty gets hers!

why did the plane crash? because the pilot was a tomato.

Two peanuts were walking down the street..........pepper.

What do you call a person who is deaf. It doesn't matter, they wont be able to hear it when you call them.

Q: whats white and smells like shit A: my ass

Jack Stevens

What did I say to my mum this morning? Good morning.

what's wose than finding a holocaust in your anti-joke? the potential offspring of courtney love and al gore

Refridgerator.

Q:What did the boy do when his girlfriend cheated on him? A:He broke up with her because cheating is wrong and he deserves better.

Wanna hear a race joke?.....whoops, ya missed it

Kid- "Where do babies come from?" Mom- (commits suicide)

haha

What's worse than the Holocaust? Nothing.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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