Two pretzels were walking down an alley way, one was assaulted. In a instinctive move, the other quickly ran away and alerted the authorities. The assaulted pretzel was severely injured but slowly recovered covered from physical trauma and has now sought professional help to deal with it's great deal of post traumatic stress.

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How do you kill a fat guy Keep giving him food he'll die eventually.

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don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!don't repeat this joke!

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Why did the man run over Suzy? He was a serial killer

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How do you get rid of black people in your back yard? Politely ask them to leave.

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Man 1: Not to be gay or anything, but I really like your shirt, it looks nice on you. Man 2: Not to be gay or anything, but I like men.

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Why did the man smell bad? He had not showered for several days

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What did the disrespectful cow say to his parents? Mooo. I hate you both

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What do call a man with no arms or no legs that sits on the couch? Grandpa after his amputations.

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Why was Timmy crying when he got home? His family was dead in a pile with a pitchfork going through each of their bodies

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Knock Knock Who's there? 20 20 Who? 24

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

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What's an X-BOX? A box where you find a treasure

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oh no a butt!!!!!!!!!! your stubid oh wait your right ahhhhhhhhhh

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How do you call a gay that is playing poker with friends You say "call" and place the right amount of fiches on the table, at that moment you are still in the race to win the pot.

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How are a chicken and a grape similar? They're both round. Except the chicken.

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Q. Why did the fence break? A. Too many mexicans were climbing it.

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What didn't the artist buy at Best Buy? A Ziploc Bag full of AIDs infested zebra pubes.

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What is black and white and red all over? A dalmation that was hacked to death with a machete.

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What's big with fat all over it? Your mom on this dick

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Whats worse than a creep? ..... Paul sweeney!

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whats fun about the governement's jokes? nothing, they are actually serious

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Why did the little boy grow up to be a homosexual man? He didn't find the female reproductive system sexually appealing

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12 niqqa 12.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops