How do you get a blonde to tell time? By asking her what time is it.

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Whats slower than molasses? Slightly thicker molasses.

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jim davidson , nick griffin , and bernard manning walk into a bar , and order a bitter, a lager, and a stout respectfully

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Why did bethany fall off the swing She had no arms Knock knock Who's there? Not Bethany

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if chuck norris had 5 dollars and you had 10 dollars you would have 5 dollars more than Chuck Norris

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead, ok!

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A horse walks into a bar and Shits John Taffer is Pissed

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What happens if a Muslim leaves their bag on a bus? They quickly return onto the bus and get it.

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Why does Magic Johnson have to use extra-large condoms? Because he's got a giant dick and HIV.

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What did Ann Frank say when she dropped her icecream Nothing because she was captured by Natzis

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how many jews does it take to fit in a mid-size sedan? -5 comfortably.

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Knock Knock Whose there? I have a gun and candy, get in the van

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Before you insult a man, walk a mile in his shoes. That way, when you insult him, you'll be a mile away, and have his shoes.

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"Hey! Did you get a haircut?" "No, I just started chemo..."

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A man walks into a pet shop. He says to the shopkeeper, "Excuse me, do you have any dogs going cheap?" The shopkeeper replies "We feel that we price our animals reasonably, but the cheapest type of dog we have is £50." The man realises that, unfortunately, he cannot afford a dog so instead he purchases a goldfish. It wasn't the same.

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Knock Knock Who is there? The IRS coming to take your house

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a registered sex offender.

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Haikus are easy But sometimes they don't make sense Refrigerator

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What's the difference between a educated black man & a educated white man? One's black, One's white

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Why did the orange cross half way across the road Because it ran out of juice

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What is a pedophile's favorite thing about twenty-six year olds? There are 20 of them.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilate was a loaf of bread.

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You can talk the talk - but can you walk the walk?

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why did the midget beat the basketball player in a foot race? the basketball player got bit by a scorpion and died within minutes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops