Rose's are red, Violet's are blue, I have a gun... Get in the van!

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Shut up, I already got that before you said it, typed it, whatever I do not give a fuck, I want the last word because, reasons of millions. I love you Nero come visit me sometime, wait ill come visit you, yes yes, but now shut up, I want the last word, because I made myself your bitch! You know its not what I mean the other way but then around again, I think, you are my I made myself your bitch, no wait, keep reading, you are, my bitch master..., pretty please let me have the last word? Never fucking mind! Have the last word, I surrender, I totally surrender I want my nose back XD.

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Q: Why did they bury the Indian? A: Because he was dead.

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How do you stop a dog from humping your leg? Suck its dick.

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I put my baby in a microwave.

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What's the Chinese guy's favorite color? Blue.

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what's small, red and sits in the corner? A naughty strawberry.

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Why did the black man get sent to prison? He had committed many crimes and was finally caught by the police.

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What day is it? Asked the man with a gun who dislikes music. Friday. Mostly because yesterday was thursday and tomorrow is Saturday. Sunday comes afterwards also. The man says "oh. I thought it was Tuesday."

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Did u know that every 60 seconds in Africa a minute passes by?

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind.

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a murderer sees a young child left alone at a park... he promptly finds the childs mother and returns her to her home.

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Why did the girl cry when her boyfriend brought up the topic about rape? Because she was raped by her father as a child and it was a suppressed memory.

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What's worse than a worm in your apple That one time I rapped and killed your mom, oh and happy birthday prick

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What do you get when a person and a cat try to have a child of some sort? Nothing because there chromosomes don't match, and there for physically impossible.

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What do you get when you cross the ocean with a dinosaur? Wet.

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John has 37 candy bars and eats 36 of them? What does John have? Diabetes, John has Diabetes.

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did you hear about the guy who got his left leg and left arm cut off? he's all right now

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What do you get when you put a woman in a room with 4 guys? She gets Gang Banged.

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A friend? Just a friend that you told to stop pretending to be me? And you had no idea whatsoever that I am Nero as in not one of the six hundred thousand wabbabes?

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What did the priest say to the young boy? Hi.

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So a crippled guy rolls into a bar..

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Q:Why did the Grape divorce the Prune? A:Because he was tired of Rasin kids! :D

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His name is Frosted Mike, and he neither has nor does not have a penis.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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