Why can't Stevie Wonder read? Clearly the only answer is because he's blind

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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why did the man ride the helicopter,because he was hurt horrible in a car accident.

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Where was Suzy during the explosion? Everywhere! Knock Knock! Who's there? Not Suzy!

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How did Pablo get into America from Mexico? He drove here!

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I like my coffee like I like my slaves... Free

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Q: Why is Little Johnny in the hospital with a bullet wound and a broken arm? A: I shot him of his bike.

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What do you do when you find a blonde on her knees? Help her up, because obviously she has fallen.

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Something strange in you're neighborhood. Who you gonna call? The police.

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A man walks into a bar. He is knocked unconscious, and passers-by rush to his aid.

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yo mammas so fat when she runs the world spins faster

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When life gives you Pure Filtered Water, Sweeteners (High Fructose Corn Syrup, Sugar), Lemon Juice from Concentrate, Less Than 0.5% of Each: Natural Flavors, Citric Acid (Provides Tartness), Modified Cornstarch, Glycerol Ester of Wood Rosin, Sodium Hexametaphosphate and Sodium Benzoate and Potassium Sorbate and Edta (to Protect Taste), Red 40 Make Lemonade.

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You might not notice at first, but in this very sentence there is a psychological phrase that is used to hypnotise you. If you read through the first sentence of this paragraph three or four times, you may start to feel the sudden urge to have a drink. This is called the ashvakalym effect.

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Hitler walks in to pizza pizza, the manager asks how many? L

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What happened to the pig? It got turned into bacon like every other pig.

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What's the difference between an American and a British guy? Their fingerprints.

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You can talk the talk - but can you walk the walk?

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Why did sarah fall of the swing? she has no arms. Knock knock. whos there? not sarah.

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A young boy trips and severly cuts his knee while running down his neighborhood street. He is promptly brought to the hospital to avoid receiving any serious infection.

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What did peter griffin say to the black guy? Oh you are black.

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What do you call an iPod that doesn't work? An iPod that doesn't work.

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Why did Dracula cross the road? To get to the other unbitten virgin.

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- Wanna see a magic trick? - Sure - Too bad. I don't know any.

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Subject A: Knock Knock! Subject B: *silence* Subsequently, Subject A dejectedly walks home and hangs himself.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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