knock knock whos there **gunshot ...man that gun show next door is annoying

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Good job, son.

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A hill billy went fishing

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Why did the robot cross the road? Because It was bionically fused to the chicken.

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A man walks into a bar. He is then taken to the hospital for his concussion, seeing as the bar was made of metal

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Why couldn't the black guy support his family? He was only 3 years old.

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? ... Well, do you know or not?

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A blonde takes a math test it says find x? She circles x and puts there it is!

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An alcoholic walks into a bar, but then realises he's ruining his family so he calls the rehab

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Why did sally fall off the swing? She got her arms cut off. Why did Sally drop her ice cream? She got hit by a truck. Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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What does an Israeli gun sound like? Jew, jew, jew, jew, jew

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What goes down well with whiskey? Pedestrians

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Dog is walking through a park and is almost stepped on by a horse. Dog says, "Hey, watch where you're going!" Horse says, "Well, looky here! A talking dog!"

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I used to work as a human cannonball. I thought I was going to get fired, however during one performance the trajectory was miscalculated and I ended up severely damaging my spinal cord. I now work from home as a IT consultant. It's depressing.

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what smells like a rose bud? a rose, bud.

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an elephant is like a guy but its nose is the di**

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Why cant the asian find his family? His eyes were too squinty

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Why did the man go to Cantabria, Spain? Because he liked potatoes... jk

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What do people call the completely paralyzed man with no eyes? David, his name.

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What did Abe Lincoln say after a 3 day drunk? "I set WHO free?"

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Why did the asain fail his tests? They weren't math tests...

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why was the jewish boy afraid of ovens? because he developed an irrational fear of kitchen appliances. he would later, as an adult seek counseling and overcome his fear.

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A man has a parrot who repeats everything the man says. He constantly complains about his mother-in-law and everytime he says her name it follows with the word bitch. One day she makes a suprise visit and he greets her with a "Oh hello Doris" , he looks in horror to see if the parrot will call her a bitch but instead finds the parrot dead because he forgot to feed it for 4 days.

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A horse enters a bar. The bartender looks at the horse and says "Why the harness?"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops