Shit.

a Mormon knocked on my front door three times, and i took three seconds to answer, whe shook hands for three seconds. how many dead kittens can fit in my blender?

What is the hardest part of a vegtable? The wheel chair 0.o

What did the doctor say to his patient? You have cancer

You're an Irish male that walks into a bar full of Mexicans. Upon entering you are approached by two topless women. ....You realize you have been coming to the same sleazy strip club on the edge of town every night after work for the past few years. After seeing that you have gradually become completely bald and neglect your two children and wife, you recognize your extreme depression. Strippers now see you as a consistent, "paying customer" and you proceed seek psychiatric care, while being prescribed anti-depressants. The Mexicans at the bar are hard working, tax-paying citizens that would like to provide an education for their children.

Two parrots are in a cage. The one looks at the other one and says, "answer the phone," and the other one says, "where are my car keys."

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What's white and black and red all over? Slaughtered Cows.

What what In the butt

Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme This one doesn't

What happened when a black man's phone went off? He answered it.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it damn well felt like it.

How do you tie your shoes underwater? In a submarine

Knock Knock. Who's there? Madame. Madame who? Just kidding it's Steve, but my damn foot's stuck in the door.

Q; What smells like chicken, tastes like turkey and looks like duck? A; Nothing...dumbass.

>>-------------[Knee]---------->>>

An asian kid in a classroom starts to squint to try to see the board that is far away. A white man looks at the kid and asks, "Hey asian, is it hard for you to see that board?" The Asian replies, "Yes, yes it is."

Have you ever had Ethiopian food? Neither have they

Knock knock... Whos there? The IRS, we are taking your house.

What's the difference between a zombie, a vampire and a werewolf? One is a zombie, one is a vampire and one is a werewolf.

What do you get when you mate an elephant with a rhino? Not much of anything except inter-species animal sex, considering the fact that the two do not share enough genetic material to create any sort of offspring.

what do Asian people eat? what Asian people eat.

live babies

A man was walking down the street and witnessed a car crashed. He was traumatize.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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