Two black people passed me in an alley at night...... They said hi

thumb_up thumb_down +48

Four guys walk into a bar. They buy their drinks and stay for a couple of hours. After they are done they get a cab ride home. It was a lovely night.

thumb_up thumb_down +44

A: Knock Knock B: I'm sleeping!

thumb_up thumb_down +44

What did the blind, deaf and mute girl get for christmas? Cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Tie her up and force her to watch as you brutally murder her entire family.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

Wanna hear a joke? No.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

why did the goose lay an egg? because it was pregnant .

thumb_up thumb_down +36

How do you start a Mexican parade? You roll a quarter down a hill

thumb_up thumb_down +34

The sandwich asked the girl to make her a boy.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

What did the boy with no legs and no arms get for Christmas? Cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Knock knock "Steve I have a door bell."

thumb_up thumb_down +34

why did the chicken cross the road? it wanted to get the waffle ice cream cone that was on the ground next to the little child who got hit by a bus.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? ........Because he was severely scared when he witnessed a stray dog bleeding out

thumb_up thumb_down +32

How do you make a clown stop smiling? You kill his family.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

What do you do when you fall asleep? You sleep.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

why couldnt the mexican jump the fence? He broke his leg.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

What do you call a tree on fire? A burning tree.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

why did the chicken cross the road? who knows, we cannot read an animals (or a human for that matter) mind. Perhaps, though unlikely as he's a chicken, he saw a friend across the road or a child who wants to stroke him. Perhaps he is trying to escape being used as a circus act or being cooked for a supermarket. We cannot complain if the chicken wishes for a better life. Anyway, we shall never know why the chicken decided to cross the road, and never will, as it is dead after being hit by a car.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Why did the casual smoker have terrible teeth? He very rarely brushed them.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

What did the black guy get on his SAT's. Barbecue sauce

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Why are Jews so tight with there money? They want to be finanically stable and provide a future for their familys.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What do you call a Muslim woman driving a plane? First, you don't "drive" planes you "fly" them. Second, you should address her as Ma'am, Captain, or Pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

An iguana walks out of a bar

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What what In the butt

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops