yo mamma so fat that when she goes out in high heels she comes back in flip flops

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roses are red violets are blue maskrosor are gula

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What's red, white, and black, and spins around and around? A penguin in a blender

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A Muslim gets off his plane from Saudi Arabia to New York and walks to customs where a TSA agent asks him "what is you business in America?" The Muslim responds "I am here for a vacation". He walks on, and returns home 10 days later.

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5 black men walk into a 7-11 at midnight. They clog the all of the toilets in the mens bathroom causing them to over run.

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What burns like hell? Gonorrhea.

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-Bumper Sticker- Honk if you love Jesus. (Text while driving if you want to meet him)

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Knock Knock Whos there Cameron oh

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Knock, knock! Who's there? No one. No one actually knocked on your door because this is just a joke.

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Why didn't little Timmy see the bus right before it hit him? Because he was blind

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What did Sally want for Christmas? Nothing, she is Jewish.

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What did the Amazonian tribesman say to the European explorer? Nothing, he was focussing on eating him.

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Can a match box? No, but a tin can.

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Why was the black man picking cotton from the backyard? Because he enjoys gardening as a hobby, and prefers to do it every Sunday, after work.

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Roses are red, Potatoes are yellow, ERMAHHHGERDDD PERRDERRRDERRR

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Two black guys are in a car. Who is driving? One of the black guys.

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what do you say to your girlfriend just after the best sex you ever had? I really got great value for money tonight with my prostitute sweety. You should have been there

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One day a terribly epileptic child is put on on a strict Atkins diet by his loving mother. A week later he finds that the frequency and intensity of his seizures have been reduced by its ketogenic effects, which provides exogenous fats for the body to burn, but limits the available carbohydrate so that ketone bodies build up. It is the high level of these ketones which appear to suppress seizures.

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A priest walks into a drug den, most people would say this is pretty contradictory to his implied beliefs.

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whats worse then getting sat on by a hippo getting sat on by Matt Ross

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i like punching orphans in the face, you wanna know why? what are they gonna do? tell their parents???

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whats worse than a 6 dead babies in a dumpster? You were babysitting them.

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What do you call a pig that does karate? By its name. Pigs are often referred to by something regarding the 'Oink' sound that they make. Perhaps in this instance, the pigs name was Oinky. However, this is only a supposition. The range of names is really too wide to make a fair prediction.

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Q: what did the man say to the woman? A: hi

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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