Q: What did the Jew get for Christmas? A: Nothing you dumbass, Jews don't celebrate Christmas.

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A priest and rabbi walk into a bar. The priest leaves because they don't have wine.

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What size pants did the gorilla wear? An abnormaly large pair compared to the average human because their weight and width are porportionaly larger for their speices.

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? Because the light was green.

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What do you call man who travels on foot? a pedestrian

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Dani Barton is a stupid GIRL

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A American seeking into mexico

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What would George Washington say if he were alive today? WHAT THE **** IS WRONG WITH THIS COUNTRY!

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Why did Sarah fall off the swings? She had no arms Knock knock Who's there? Not Sarah

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this is madness! Madness? no, nevah... THIS IS SPARTA!!!!!! NO, THIS IS PATRICK!!!

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Knock Knock Who's there? Mike Mike who? Just kidding, it's Danny. Oh okay, come in.

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Q: What did the terrorist do when he walked into the football stadium? A: Set off a bomb, killing him and others there

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What's the difference between ten dead babies and a Ferrari. A Ferrari isn't in my garage.

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How do you make your house smell bad? fart

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Knock knock. Who's there? The Police. Your family is dead...

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Why did the man get fired from his Job? The boss became his ex girlfriend 2 minutes ago

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Why did the student fail his test? Because he has AIDS darragh hamilton

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A Christian, a Sunni Muslim, and a Shi'a Muslim walked into a government building. Turns out, they were Lebanese, so this was a normal occurrence. Thus, to draw any humor from it before first taking into account the weaknesses of your own government would be both unwise and unfair.

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knock knock, whos there? the bum bum boys ready to dance :) ``~ ``sms

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What did the (real) wrestler say to the U.F.C guy? Probably something nice because most U.F.C fighters were wrestlers.

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Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man returns and says, "My friend does not have a pulse, so I stand by my prior assumption that he is dead."

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What do you call a kid with no arms, no legs, and an eyepatch? Names.

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JOSH BROWN STOP ADDING PEOPLES NAMES TO THE END OF YOUR TRUE STORIES!

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's house? No. Well, neither has he

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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