Did you hear about the kid from Texas? He shot his campus up.

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Why the moron throw the clock out the window? Because he was a moron.

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Why do the man leave his tv on? He was murdered while he was watching tv

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A man goes to the hospital he says to the doctor while poking his leg it hurts here. Then he pokes his arm and here. Then his head and here. "Yes" the doctor says you've broken your finger.

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Q: How do you know a chinese guy robbed your house? A: your homework is done, your computer is updated, and 2 hours later he is still trying to back out of your driveway

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What has four legs and a tail? A table with a tail

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What did the calculator screen say? Cos0=1

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Why did the family sue disney? Because at a meet and greet location mickey mouse shot their youngest in the heart.

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Why can't Benitio Mussolini win the war? Becuase he's dead.

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what do mexicans cross? whatever they want. but in this case their local grocery store parking lot to buy fresh produce.

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A man takes a bite into a tuna casserole and burns his tounge. He is also a hermaphradite.

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What do you call a black pilot? A pilot, you racist.

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Why was the uneducated black guy raped? To make this joke more risky and therefore funnier.

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What did the fat kid eat for dinner? Salad, he's on a diet.

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Your mother is so fat that she has to undergo amputation of her foot because of type 2 diabetes.

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knock knock go away

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do you know what Noah didn't bring on his arc? unicorns

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Why was the little boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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What's worse than getting raped by a bear? Getting raped by two bears.

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A black man and a mexican man are in a car. Who is driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken a month off from working in their law firm. The mexican man, Alex, had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. Rain had suddenly come upon them and a passing off-duty police officer had picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel. The three men had drinks and the friends had a wonderful rest of their trip. Alex, however never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months after their return John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

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I know how to make a brilliant telescope out of an empty jar, some leather, a string and a brilliant telescope.

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Showcasing you? Really? I am tired too, yeah its daytime here as well, sleep well then. Hey, by the way, when you where like posting a lot of weird comments, where you trying to impress me?

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Q. How many alzhimers patients dose it take to screw in a light bulb? A. To get to the other side

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Q. What do you call a man with a shovel in his head? A. An ambulance due to the fact that he has a rather serious head wound.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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