ARGH! LADY THAT SNAKE BIT MY PECKER! YOU HAVE TO SUCK THE POISON OUT NOW! OMG SURE, err...Meh, thats not a poisonous snake... Oh... dammit! I mean phew! Ouch ouch ouch!

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alert('The Game')

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Godilla walks into a bar. There were no survivors.

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My math homework brings all the asians to the yard and their like it wasent that hard and their like it wasent that hard. comment what song it is like.

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What's an X-BOX? A box where you find a treasure

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Why did the kid drop his ice cream? Because he was laughing so hard at the man who farted and burped at the same time.

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whats big and green and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? a snooker table

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when your out of toilet paper what do you do? get more

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How do you make a firefighter happy? Give him a blowjob and 10 million dollars.

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Roses are red,violets are blue I've got aids & now so do you Merry Christmas

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There was this guy at a bar, just looking at his drink. He stays like that for half of an hour. Then, this big trouble-making truck driver steps next to him, takes the drink from the guy, and just drinks it all down. The poor man starts crying. The truck driver says, "Come on man, I was just joking. Here, I'll buy you another drink. I just can't stand to see a man cry." "No, it's not that. This day is the worst of my life. First, I fall asleep, and I go late to my office. My boss, outrageous, fires me. When I leave the building, to my car, I found out it was stolen. The police said that they can do nothing. I get a cab to return home, and when I leave it, I remember I left my wallet and credit cards there. The cab driver just drives away." "I go home, and when I get there, I find my wife in bed with the gardener. I leave home, and come to this bar. And just when I was thinking about putting an end to my life, you show up and drink my poison."

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What's worse then having gum stuck on the bottom of your shoe? Having a stick poked in your eye. What's worse then having a stick poked in your eye? Having a nail go through your foot. What's worse then having a nail go through your foot? Having a stick poked in your eye and a nail going through your foot.

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Roses are red Violets are blue You think this will rhyme But it's not gonna

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I had some crack, my unicorn says hi.

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What's black and white all over and has a mouth? A Zebra

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If a tree falls in the woods, how many animals lost their home to deforestation?

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What haircut did Timmy get at the barbershop? He didn't, he saved money from the barber by going through chemo.

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So, I walk into a bar and say "Why do you call this place a bar, I don't see any bars in here!" HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

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"Lets begin, tell me about yourself," "ok, well first I'm a open book and..." "ok next" "why?" "I fucking hate books!"

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How do you sink a Polish submarine? Hit it with a torpedo.

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i did a 360 noscope, then i jizzed. from dylan

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25

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What did the ghost say when it stubbed its toe? Ow

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A man walked into a bar. He left in a body bag.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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