Why did the old man go to the retirement home? The 75 year old man had a 45 year career in pluming and he thought it was a good time to retire after saving enough money to be happy and he could spend the rest of his life with his wife. The retirement home was also not that far away from his grandchildren so he liked the location and the home was also very clean and the workers seemed very nice. But this was just a visit to see if he liked it, he may live there soon.

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No, I had no idea, nor did I know that Nero means Black or Darkness until I searched it up some weeks ago. No, I would never photoshop anything, I mean sure I am the girl/woman thing with the big tits, but that`s like all I got going... Oh and yeah I use glasses sometimes because these contact lenses become itchy after a while and stuff.

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why do black people like lotion? because everybody else does.

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I have read and agreed to the terms of service

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Q: yugdyijgdripgdghd A: sorry I'm retarted. I don't know wtf I'm doin

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what did god say when we made his first nigga oops i acidenlty burnt it

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took my chevy to the levy but the levy was dry

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a white man, an asian man, and a mexican man are on a plane and they realize how inefficient the airline was in filling the flight, seeing as there were only three men on board.

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Q.Why did Bruno Mars marry the blond? A.Because it was a beautiful night and he was looking for something DUMB to do.

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A Jew, a Christian, and a Muslim walk into a bar. A good time was had by all, until closing time.

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My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard. I guess I make a good milkshake.

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Q: How many surrealists does it take to change a light bulb? A: Ele PHa n T

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What's worse than a bruise in your knee? A bruise in your other knee. And what is worse than that? The Holocaust. And what is worse than that? A second Holocaust, much bigger, with much more casualties.

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What does a handsome guy and an ugly girl have in common? Nothing

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What's worse than nailing 10 babies to a wall? Ripping them off.

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What did the little black boy get for Christmas? Hopefully something nice.

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Why did the whale cross the road? He was being chased by the Japanese.

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"Doctor, Doctor, Help I feel like a pair of curtains" "I've got some cream for that".

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Why did the dinosaur cross the road? It didn't.

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Why can't you hear a pterodactyl going to the bathroom? Because dinosaurs died out 65.5 million years ago.

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Knock Knock Who's there? re-posession officers

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Q: Why did the little girl fall from the swing? A: Because she didn't have arms. Q2: And why did she fall from the swing again? A2: Because she tried to get on it again.

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Q: What was the pirate movie rated? A: PG-13 actually because, despite the potentially graphic nature of the previews, the creators scaled down mature content so that it could reach a wider audience.

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I have a toaster. I have two subway coupons and a handful of pubic hair equal trade baby

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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