Why did the chicken cross the road? He was disowned by his family due to his drug addiction and had nowhere else to go.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

How do fish die in water? The BP oil spill

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What did the little boy get for christmas? Nothing. He's jewish

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Potatoes have skin, i have skin, so there i must be a pig

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why Did the throw up He was sick

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Q: What's wrong with the world today? A: Everything

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? The chicken was locked in a cage and the nearest intersection is about a mile away.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

whats brown and falls out poop :) - haha

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Not only did 7 have that intimidating look to him, but 6 had recently found out that he was a well known mob boss who also went by the name of Lucky Seven. he was in charge of a gang called The Prime Numbers. They had been terrorizing 6's city for sometime now, whether it was stealing, mugging, or even killing or vandalism. 6 sure had a lot to fear, but he knew things might turn out well, as 6 had a great ability to try his best and do what he believed in: Justice

thumb_up thumb_down -28

What's the difference between a baby and an egg? One is fun to throw at houses and the other is an egg.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

What is Cleopatra's favorite cookie? A: Chips Ahoy

thumb_up thumb_down -36

what did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? a bike

thumb_up thumb_down -40

Why did the women cover up her vaginal area? She was with her friends, queefed, and was extremely self conscious.

thumb_up thumb_down -40

Why did the little girl jump off a cliff? because she was at a cliff jump at a water park

thumb_up thumb_down -74

What did the gay guy get for Christmas? AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down -80

what do you call a black doctor ? a doctor moron

thumb_up thumb_down +97

A plane carries 500 bricks. 1 falls out. How many bricks are left? 499. How do you put an elephant in a fridge in 3 steps? Open the fridge, put in the elephant, and close the fridge. How do you put a deer in a fridge in 4 steps? Open the fridge, take out the elephant, put in the deer, then close the fridge. The Lion King is having a party. All the animals are there except for one; who is it? The deer: He is still in the fridge. An old lady is crossing a swamp, but it is a crocodile swamp. How does she cross? Normally, all the crocodiles are at the Lion King's party The old lady dies at the edge of the swamp. How? A brick falls from the sky and kills her.

thumb_up thumb_down +85

Joey and Jack walked into a bar, and proceeded to have gay sex on the floor.

thumb_up thumb_down +63

Why did the man smile at his wife? Because she had a silly looking face, like a fish.

thumb_up thumb_down +59

Why did the chicken cross the road? He realized he was in the ghetto

thumb_up thumb_down +53

Knock knock! "It's unlocked"

thumb_up thumb_down +49

Four guys walk into a bar. They buy their drinks and stay for a couple of hours. After they are done they get a cab ride home. It was a lovely night.

thumb_up thumb_down +47

How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall. First of all, babies do not have the physical ability or the mental capacity to ever paint a wall, no matter how many of them there are. Second of all, they are dead which probably will not increase their chances of painting said wall.

thumb_up thumb_down +45

Why is one side of a geese formation heading south always longer than the other? It has more geese

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops