- Anti Joke

Knock knock. MAN: Who's there? HOOKER: The hooker you called for. MAN: Oh, dear lord. My wife hasn't left yet. I need you to come back in fifteen minutes. WIFE: Honey, who is it? MAN: It's the hooker I called for, but you haven't left. I told her to come back in fifteen minutes.

Mom mom momie mom mom mom mom momie mother mother. What! Hi.

Q: Why is grass green? A: I painted it.

Whats green, has four legs, and falls out of a tree? A Pool Table. Use your imagination.

A good way to remember which one is Beavis and which one is Butthead is to remember the acronym "Baby Blues." B in baby stands for Beavis, and b in blues stands for Butthead. You're welcome.

Me: What's the difference between a zebra and a slice of cheese? You: I don't know Me: Me neither

What do you call a black man backfilping off a roof The dark knight

What did the black man say when a blond walked into the bar? " Hi Molly"

Father Time and Mother Nature did the nasty, and had a kid called humanity. It had down syndrome. Very sad.

Q. What is worse than a worm in your apple? A. Hitler

What did the homeless man get for christmas? Nothing, but he did purchase whiskey with the little money he had to drink away his misery, and to suppress his suicidal thoughts that were a result of his alcoholism which stemmed from his father's abusive nature.

Yo momma so stupid she threw a rock at the ground And missed.

What happens when the hydro goes out for 1 second? 1 minute? 1 hour? 1 day? 1 month? 1 year? -1.8 people die. 105 people die. 6,306 people die. 151,338 people die. 4,603,198 people die. 55,238,376 people die. Aw shit, then you have to take account for how many people die of starvation :\, and the ones who froze to death, and the ones who died from heat stroke, And the ones who died of Alzheimers.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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whaT DID HEVEN SAY TO THE FRIDGE hAVE YOU GOT A COLD

hat did the fridge say to the oven your hot baby \

what did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? A- a tv

Roses are red Violets are blue I have herpes You should probably get yourself checked.

Why was the Mexican in the back of a pick up truck? There were not any available seats.

What did Stephen Hawking say after he scaled Mount Everest? Yay!

Why did the bear turn red? Because I fucking stabbed it!

A wild Snorlax appeared crushing several members of the community

What do a turtle and an eagle have in common? They can both fly. Except for the turtle.