Doctor: Why the long face? Elephant Man: That's not my face that's a tumor.

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Many people dont know this about me, but I'm not very famous.

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Knock Knock Who's there? My foot. My foot who? My foot in your ass.

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A fully grown cow walks into a man's house and says to him, "Hey, how have you been?" Traumatized by the vivid circumstances, the man falls to the floor and begins sobbing relentlessly until he passes out onto the floor from a violent mental breakdown.

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whats similar between a chicken and an alligator they both gobble except for they alligator

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What did the retarded handicap say to the bully who called him the biggest retard in the world? "atleast I didn't make SOPA"

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What's worse than finding 7 dead babies in a bin? Finding one is missing.

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Why can't Larry drive? Larry's a rock.

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What do you call a midget driving a train? A conductor

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There is a high speed pursuit when suddenly the suspect's car skids out of control and crashes into a field. Two cows witness the commotion, when one turns round to the other and says "Moo"

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Q: What's worse than not having a good relationship? A: Starving Africans

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So a ninja walks into a bar and he sees a cowboy and the ninja says i will kill you with my mad ninja skills and the cowboy says who needs mad ninja skills when you got a gun

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Seven monkeys jumping on the bed. One fell off and bumped his head! Momma called the doctor, And the doctor said, "I'm sorry, Mrs.Monkey, but your son has suffered a severe concussion, and will be severely mentally impaired for the rest of his life."

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What's worse than being fired? Eating a bucket of diarrhea.

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What do you do when you see a black man getting hitted by a Mexican taxi? -Call 911

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Roommate 1: I want to make food but I'm not going to Roommate 2: Why not? Roommate 1: Because I'm tired and lazy.

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What did the man say when he found a bar of soap in his mailbox? Why is there soap in my mailbox?

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Knock knock. ... Knock knock. ... Knock knock. ... The FedEx man leaves, realizing that no one was home, and continues on with his job.

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Three Jews walked into a bar. I lied... it was a gas chamber.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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what do mexicans cross? whatever they want. but in this case their local grocery store parking lot to buy fresh produce.

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What has four legs and a tail? A table with a tail

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Why did the family sue disney? Because at a meet and greet location mickey mouse shot their youngest in the heart.

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What did John name his dog? Doggy

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops