Q. What did the chinease man say when he got flattened by a plane? A. Nothing, he died instantly.

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What's worse than finding ants in your kitchen? A truckload of dead babies.

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Q-What's the good thing about dating a girl volleyball player? A- She's a Girl

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- Mom, you have a banana in you ear. - What? Son I can't hear you, I have banana in my ear.

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We decided to post a joke on anti-joke and see if we can get any rapings

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Ditto, the Slut Pokemon. Ditto is a bisexual f@ggot who will f*ck any Pokemon that moves.

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A grasshopper walks into a bar and no one notices because it's just a little insect.

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Q: What do you call an underground train full of professors? A: It's very unlikely that the passengers on an underground train would consist entirely of professors, unless it was a special service booked solely for the attendees of highly specialised lectures which required each audience member to have completed a professorship.

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I wish there were a city named Sample. So that the sign can say "Urine Sample"

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Nothing, because he is an orphan.

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Whats funnier than a dead baby? a dead baby in a clown costume!!!

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How many dead babies can you fit in a tire? It depends on the size of the tire.

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What should you do if reading the antijokes on this site makes you collapse with laughter? There is no need to worry about this because it won't happen.

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An armadillo walks into a bar, and shouts "I hear you don't serve armadillos." "That is correct," the bartender replies.

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A man is riding down the road on his horse, Sally. He happens to see a horse without a rider, but with two saddles. He finds this peculiar, continues into town, and has a fine day.

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What is the answer to life, universe and everything? Nothing.

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What did the blonde say when she fell out of a tree? Nothing, she shattered her trachea upon landing.

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Q: How do you make Osama Bin Ladin happy? A: Take him out to a nice seafood dinner free of charge.

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What did the man screem before he crashed his car? i dont know, he died.

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How do you get a black man out of a tree? You provide him with a ladder of varying length depending on his height in the tree and hold the ladder to ensure that it is stable and safe while he is climbing down. If he his very high in the tree then it may be helpful to call the fire department for assistance in getting him down.

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A spatial closet situates trolls beside the whistle.

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knock knock..... ding dong...... knock knock!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! they weren't home

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A bar walks into a man

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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