There were once three brothers who were traveling along a lonely, winding road at twilight. In time, the brothers reached a river too deep to wade through and too dangerous to swim across. However, these brothers were learned in the magical arts, and so they simply waved their wands and made a bridge appear across the treacherous water. They were halfway across it when they found their path blocked by a hooded figure. This hooded figure then proceeded to step out of the shadows and mug them, all three of them were brutally murdered. This is why you stay away from hooded figures when you are being talked about in a story being told in third person.

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Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue I Have ADD ...

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What do u call a dumb Asian. An american

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Do you know how to save a drowning laywer? Approach with caution as drowing victims can panic, thus pushing you under. If possible throw a floatation device rather than go in yourself, or hold out a stick and instruct them to grab one end while you pull them in with the other. If necessary perform CPR. Call an ambulance and monitor for hypothermia.

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Why is purple the best color. Cuz icecream has no bones

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What do you call someone who kills a black man? A murderer

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(A man goes to visit his neighbor) Knock! Knock! ...................... ................... ................ ............ he walks back home

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Does Anti-Joke have a purpose?

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The saying "When Pigs Fly" Can easily be canceled. Just tie a rocket and wings to it and let it go.

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There was three women stuck on an island, a blonde, a brunette and a ranga. They are saved days later.

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*Knock Knock* Who's there? "Justin Bieber" And you let him in because he's a young talented singer.

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Yo Mama so ugly I don't know how she found your dad.

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what happens when you punt a baby in between 2 poles? you get 3 points

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A lost young boy walks into a bar to ask for a map. The Bartender takes him into a room and rapes him.

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How many days can a pelican whisper? Pelicans can't whisper.

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why did the dog cross the street? because it saw a squirrel

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a man walks into a bad part of town he is shot 13 times and dies.

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I love this website, oh shit *Car* Dead*

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Do you like fish sticks? Yes. Me too.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor Wheres my tractor?

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Knock knock. Who's there? Your best friend. No it's not, you stupid repo man...I'M NOT OPENING THE DOOR.

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What do you call it when Justin Beiber has sex with a woman? Sex

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"Why the long face?" The bartender asked. "I was born with a severe cleft palette and a jaw deformity. The surgery lets me eat and drink but my parents couldn't afford the cosmetic part of the surgery, the scarring got worse as I grew older. Can I have a beer please?" I replied.

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Knock knock Come in

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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