Why is purple the best color. Cuz icecream has no bones

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5 blondes walk into a bar They all leave very intoxicated and die in a car accident shortly after.

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? After losing its family, the chicken had became an adrenaline junkie and enjoyed the rush of doing such dangerous things. It subsequently became addicted to opium.

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How do you stop a dog from humping your leg? Suck its dick.

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phil - "honey, why is the picture quality so bad" Phil was watching a toaster

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What do you call a person without any arm no legs and a eye patch? names

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Whats the diffrence between a white and a black guy? one of them is black

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What do you call a black salesman? A salesman, you racist.

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why did the blue berry cross the road

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Why did the serial killer need the knife? He needed to butter his bread

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Why did the nervous man jump out of a plane? He was sky diving.

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What's brown and sticky? A black man's dick after raping you.

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A woman walks into the kitchen to see her husband cooking dinner because gender stereotypes have been dead for years.

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Your mother is so fat, she developed diabetes and was rushed to hospital. She might not make it.

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teacher:humpty dumpty sat on a wall.... me: wait, why was he up there ms.park? teacher: well hes never been the same since vietnam, his wife divorced him and now hes a raging alcoholic.

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An Asian walks into a bar and says, "1???????????"

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what did the n i g g e r with alzheimers say to the c h i n k? 9/11 was the funniest fake joke since the holocaust and 9/11 and the holocaust and 9/11... and... what?

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Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue I Have ADD ...

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What do you get when you throw a piano down a mine shaft? A flat minor.

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mirror mirror on the wall who has the most desire of them all? Matt Daly!

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Penis-biter

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a man checks his brand new cellphone to see if he has a text message... He has cancer

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What's the hardest part of eating a vegetable? Putting her back in the wheelchair

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A guy walks into a bar and hears a someone crying. He asks the bartender who is crying and the bartender says "It's my goat. He's been crying since Tuesday, I'm giving a $500 reward to whoever can make him stop." So the man walks to the back and whispers something to the goat's ear and suddenly the goat starts laughing. The bartender was so amazed at what happened and says "Wow, thank you kind sir! Here's your reward money." and the man takes the money and leaves. The next day the man returns to the bar and the bartender says "Hey, ever since you made my goat laugh he hasn't stopped. He's been driving me nuts. I'll give you another $500 to make him stop." So again, the man goes to the back of the bar and whispers to the the goats ear. Suddenly, the goat start crying again. The bartender can't believe it. He asks "How in the world did you do that? What did you say to my goat?" The man says "Well the first time I saw your goat I told him a joke." "Okay, that explains why he kept laughing..." the bartender asks "Now, what did you say to make him cry?" The man replies "I told him..." Suddenly the goat escapes and goes completely crazy and kills everybody in the bar with his horns. Till this day no one knows what the man said to the goat.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops