Q: why did the chicken cross the road? A: nobody knows, but the road was royally pissed off.

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Why did Superman not stop the planes on 9/11? He was quadroplegic.

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What happened to the blonde who blew out her birthday candles? Her hair caught on fire

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What do you call a man with a black head, a red body, white arms and yellow legs? To get to the other side.

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To girl in a bar: Grab your coat love... It's cold in my basement.

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How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light bulb? Well that would be crude and insensitive to ask a person with dementia to do a task so easily performed by a person who is not non compos mentis.

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Why did the blind kid hit the other kid in the face? He was trying to give him a high-five.

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Fill in the _________ Ans: Cup Posted By: Lram

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Two Mexicans walk into a police station... they don't come out!

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Q: Whats big, strong, black, and sexy? A: Your imaginary dick

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Why does Santa go through the chimmney? He's to lazy to use the door.

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? The chicken was locked in a cage and the nearest intersection is about a mile away.

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A skeleton walks into a bar and orders a beer and a mop.

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Johnny just finished his pie.

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How do you kill a blonde? I don't. Murder is a crime.

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A ship sinks in the middle of the South Pacific, only one man survives. He swims over to a deserted island.

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roses are red, violets are blue, I have a gun, get in the van

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how do you get a girl to stop ignoring you? you kill her family with her watching.

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Do you know what's funny about the holocaust? Nothing, it was an unspeakably evil act by a deranged man who should never have been given the power to command a nation

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Why did the little girl jump off a cliff? because she was at a cliff jump at a water park

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Want to know who gets head a lot? Balloons

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Q: why did the boy fall off his bike? A: he wasn't very coordinated

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What did susan boyle say when she saw a 10 year old boy get hit by a bus? "OH MY GOD, SOMEBODY RING AN AMBULANCE"

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What did Niel Patrick Harris do after coming out of the closet? He grabbed his jacket and went for a delightful stroll in the park.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops