Why did the chicken open door? It can't. Chickens don't have hands.

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Can a rabbit jump higher than a tree? Trees can't jump

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If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

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My life has been getting worse and worse since I developed cancer.

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When life gives you cancer, make cancer-aids.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a pool? Phil, because that's his name.

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Have u seen Ray Charles' piano "no" neither did he

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A man walks into a bar. He walks out again remembering he forgot his wallet.

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joe galasso from plainview ny

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6 in every 9 people find a dirty reference in every joke. This statistic is in fact false, as 5 in 9 people actually find a dirty reference.

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Q: How fast does an F-16 fly? A: Pretty Fast

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had two penises.

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Q: How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Let's go ride bikes!

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Guy 1: "Smells like UpDog in here." Guy 2: "No it doesnt.."

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Knock Knock Who's there? Ken. Can I some and use your toilet, I really need a shit.

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What does it mean when the drummer drools out of both sides of their mouth? That they've may have had a stroke and you should immediately call 911.

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A blond is on her way driving to the airport when she sees the sign "Airport left." She made a left turn and got to her flight on time.

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why did the chicken cross the road? i have no idea, i dont know what goes on in a chicken's brain. the better question would be why was a chicken loose in a city

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Why did the blond fall down? She died.

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A man is talking to his friend. The man suddenly picks up a banana. He says "hello anybody there?" The banana says "yes." After a while of conversing, the man suddenly puts the banana down in a sad type of way. The man then says to his friend "I'm sorry, but your sun has just died in horrible accident.

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Why did the cookie shader Because someone dropped it

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What starts with a J, and burned in the oven? My Jumbalaya, i left it in for too long...

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What's the quickest way to a person's heart? A knife

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Why was the boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops