roses are blue violets are red... i have to use the bathroom

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What's the difference between bird flu and swine flu? If you have bird flu, you need tweetment. If you have swine flu, you need oink-ment.

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Yo momma so ugly..... what more do you want

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Why was the black man picking cotton? Because he was in an area where slavery is a socially and morally accepted practice.

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What happens if you punch a girl? An equal rights protest.

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Why didn't the little girl show up for school? Because she was dead.

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A man walks into a bar. He is rushed to the hospital and has his wounds treated.

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What comes after 7? Pedophiles.

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Five guys in white sheets chase a black man down the street. It is Halloween and all six people are close friends and enjoy goofing around.

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A guy walks into a bar- he walks out of the bar because the beer was expensive and he didn't feel like getting drunk.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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How did the black guy swim across the Atlantic? He didn't. He was prepared to, but then went on Expedia and found a ticket with Continental Airlines that was in his budget. He did not like the amount of service he recieved, and decided in the future he will save up and fly with a different company, or in fact swim across.

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Did you hear the one about the deaf guy and the rhinoceros? Neither did he.

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yo mama is so fat that a kid said to her ' The White Buddha Has Returned'

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What Did The Farmer Say When He Lost His Tractor.... "Wheres My Tractor"

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Why couldn't the Egyptian pharaoh solve the Rubik's Cube? He didn't know how.

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what did one gay guy say to the other gay guy? want to suck dicks? (cause that's what gays do)

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Fight fire with with fire! That would be impossible, it'd just make the fire bigger. And probably kill you.

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What was the color of the big lipped, struggling rap artist who violently raped and killed a young woman after robbing a convenience store at gunpoint? Red. He was covered in blood.

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What do you call a blonde who passed the SAT's? An excellent student.

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What's the difference between difference and between? One is difference the other is between.

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A guy walked into a bar a hundred years ago and but a pint of whiskey. He is dead now.?

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What is Godzilla's favorite sport? Nothing, Godzilla is a fictional character.

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Knock Knock Who's There Carly Carly Who Hey I just met you, and this is crazy So here's my number and call me maybe

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops