women are like buddhist shrines, you don't piss on them

What do you call an arab ?

What do you call a black pilot? A PILOT

What's the deal with airline food? Food tastes different on an airplane. The atmosphere dries out your nose, the air pressure numbs 1/3 of your taste buds, and low humidity levels give you cotton mouth. These factors cause the food to taste worse than it normally would.

Q: What's white and sticky? A: Glue.

What's green and has wheels? Nope, it's a car.

What the small boy with no arms or legs get fro christmas???? cancer

whats the difference between a jew and a boy scout? - The boy scout comes home from camp.

Why did the girl fall off the swings? -because she had no arms

What do you call the offspring of an elephant? A baby elephant.

What's the difference between Batman and a black guy? One is a guy that dresses up like a bat and fights crime and the other is just a mild-mannered person.

There is a really funny joke which can only be seen by smart people, it goes as such:

knock knock who's there bob bob who bob marley who else

How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? That's not funny.

how many Amish men does it take to change a lightbulb? Just one, but the likelihood of an Amish man needing to change a lightbulb is very slim.

Q: What did the giraffe say to the sunflower? A: I like your shoelaces!

What did the girl say to the guy who poked her on Facebook? You poked me.

How many dead babies can you fit in the trunk of a car? Depends on the car.

A man walks into a haunted house and screams. He had arrows on a nail.

What's the difference between two elephants? One is dead.

What's big, black, and just knocked an 8 year old girl off of her bike? The refrigerator I just threw at her. (not all are white you know)

Why isn't Pluto a planet? Because it mutilated my dog

Two Canadian men are sitting in a room. Man 1: Do you know what happens when you shoot a wolverine? Man 2: No. Man 1: It absorbs the bullets, duh. The second man proceeds to go outside with a gun. He returns in a few minutes. Man 1: What did you do with that gun? Man 2: I shot a wolverine. Man 1: What happened? Man 2: It fell over and died. I think you watch too much X-Men.

hey whats your name Im gonna hit you so hard........ that im gonna knock your block off

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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